IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Making a complaint You recently bought a new piece of equipment for your home but it did not work. You phoned the store but still no action has been taken. Write a letter to the store manager. In your letter: - describe what equipment you bought - explain the problem with the new equipment - say what would you like the manager to do

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Dear manager, I am writing
this
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 letter to make a complaint about the Sky Clean washing machine I purchased from your store and to request a product exchange. Let me start by giving you information about the exact model I acquired.
Last
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 Saturday I went to your store to buy the newest Platinum washing machine from Sky Clean brand. To my satisfaction, the ultramarine blue with metalized buttons option was available, so I ordered it. The issue seems to be coming from inside the machinery.
Therefore
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, it was not visible at first sight. Once turned on, it switched to pour the liquid soap in and, after a few minutes, I saw that the water was full of oil. Later on, I was able to identify that it came from the detergent compartment. As for what actions I demand you to take, first I want to exchange
this
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 product for another new one from the same brand and colour collection, if possible. If there is none available, I would like to ask for a refund, as I have no intention to give another try with a brand I do not trust. I hope to hear from you within the next ten days.
Otherwise
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, I might have to take
this
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 matter to law. Yours faithfully, Amanda Lago

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Tone and Style
While your letter does a commendable job of organizing ideas and adhering to the task's requirements, there are opportunities for refinement to reach a higher band. Consider a more personal and direct language style, especially in the introduction and closing parts, to establish a stronger connection with the reader.
Logical Structure
To improve coherence and cohesion, strive for a tighter logical structure by ensuring that each paragraph clearly progresses from one point to the next. This can be achieved through more deliberate use of linking phrases suitable for formal complaint letters.
Tone
In your closing remarks, instead of implying a threat to take legal action, it would be more effective to express hope for a peaceful and satisfactory resolution. This maintains a firm yet respectful tone appropriate for the situation.
Greeting and Closing
To elevate your greeting and closing, you could personalize your letter further by addressing the manager with a more specific greeting if their name is known, and by signing off in a manner that better reflects the seriousness of your complaint, yet remains courteous.
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