IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

You have heard that your company is organising a language training abroad for a limited number of participants. Write a letter of interest state your position in the company explain why they should include you in the training Explain how training could benefit you and your company.

#company #language #participants #interest #position #benefit
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Good afternoon, dear sir. My name is Anastassia, from the Palliative Department. I
listened
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heard
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 that our hospital had organised a language training in one of the US hospitals. I'll be really glad to participate in
this
 training for several reasons. First and foremost, I got
the
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a
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 degree
of
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as
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the
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a
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 Nurse Practitioner, joined
to
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apply
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the Palliative Department, and
moreover
, I completed the course of medical research several months ago.
Secondly
, international
researching
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research
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 may increase the status of our division
in
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at
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 an international rate. I have some ideas about the theme of
such
a
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apply
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research, but unfortunately,
amy
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my
Amy
 English level is not enough to write the whole abstract, despite
of
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apply
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my ongoing English lessons. In conclusion, I'm convinced, that
this
 abroad language training would
rise
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raise
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 my English skills to the appropriate grade.
Submitted by anastasia on

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task achievement
Include a more formal greeting and salutation to maintain a professional tone. Consider addressing the letter to a specific person if possible.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph presents a single, clear idea. For instance, consider separating details of your qualifications and your reasons for wanting to join the training into distinct paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Use connecting words and phrases to improve the logical flow of sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
The letter is polite and demonstrates genuine interest in the language training opportunity.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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