IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

The table below highlights data on the number of travelers using three major German airports between 2007 and 2012

#data #travelers #three #german #airports
Given is a set of tabulated data indicating comprehensive information regarding the number of
passengers
 of 3 various airports in Germany in a 6-year period, commencing in 2007 and culminating in 2012. From an
overall
 perspective, it is starkly apparent that with the exception of 2009, Frankfurt was the most popular one, and 2012 saw the most
passengers
 in opposition of 2007 when the total number was lower.
A more
Remove the article
More
show examples
 rigorous scrutiny reveals that Dusseldorf represented 27.2
million
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
, increasing substantially and reaching an all-time high in 2009 with 48.2
million
 following which
this
 amount showed a downward trend and reached almost 33
million
passengers
 in 2011,
however
, it rose again by nearly 12.5
million
 people in 2012. As regards Frankfort, it can be deduced that it faced an exponential rise throughout the period.
while
 the number of
passengers
 accounted for 36.5 in 2009, it peaked in 2012 with almost 69
million
. regarding Berlin Tegel, it can be seen that it went in parallel with Frankfurt. It hit
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rock bottom in 2009 with 17.3
million
,
whereas
 reached a peak in 2012 with 43.3
million
.
Submitted by samirakasraee72 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion
Ensure to provide a clear introduction and conclusion to give your essay a logical flow. Summarize the main points in the conclusion.
supported main points
Clarify the main points and support them with specific data from the table. For example, mentioning the exact figures clearly helps to strengthen your argument.
logical structure
Avoid overly complex sentences that may confuse the reader. Try to break down longer sentences and make them easier to understand.
task achievement
You have successfully identified and described the key trends in the data over the given period of six years.
clear comprehensive ideas
The essay demonstrates a good attempt to summarize the comparison between the three airports in terms of passenger numbers.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: