IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Water scarcity is a serious problem in many countries. What are the causes of this? And what solutions can be done by individuals and the government?

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Use synonyms
Water
Add an article
The water
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 crisis has become a global vital issue.
Overpopulation
Use synonyms
 is one of many reasons why
water
Use synonyms
 has become scarce,
due to
Linking Words
 its demand increased over the century, directly or indirectly.
This
Linking Words
 essay
would
Wrong verb form
will
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 discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
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how
the
Correct article usage
apply
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individuals and the government should play their part
to solve
Change preposition
in solving
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this
Linking Words
 problem.
Overpopulation
Use synonyms
 is clearly the reason
to
Change preposition
for
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 the increasing demand
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
water
Use synonyms
. The more population
created
Add a missing verb
is created
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 on the earth, the more
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
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 need
water
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 for everyday use.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the significant growth of humankind would progressively lead to other rising
demand
Fix the agreement mistake
demands
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such
Linking Words
 as food, clothes, etc. And with the surge of these needs,
water
Use synonyms
 usage would become more and more crucial.
For instance
Linking Words
,
farm
Fix the agreement mistake
farms
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 and
ranch
Correct your spelling
ranchs
 share the biggest part of
water
Use synonyms
 usage over anything. The amount of
water
Use synonyms
 for their livestock industry is
overwhelmed
Replace the word
overwhelming
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.
Thus
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,
overpopulation
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 intelligibly directly and indirectly caused the scarcity of
water
Use synonyms
. As
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
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, it is fundamental to know how to manage our
water
Use synonyms
. Including
water
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 management
at
Change preposition
in
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 our small neighborhood and our very own household. Not wasting
water
Use synonyms
 for useless things
Linking Words
also
Add a missing verb
is also
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 a part of proper
water
Use synonyms
 management.
Nevertheless
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, there is a limit on how individual prevents the deficiency of
water
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,
therefore
Linking Words
 the government should step in. The related authority could rule the
water
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 management of the city and create
water
Use synonyms
 conversion law with
targeted
Add an article
a targeted
the targeted
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 audience. To illustrate, they could create
program
Add an article
a program
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 about the circulation of
water
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 stating that regions with abundant
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
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 of
water
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 should give their capacity to other regions that need more
water
Use synonyms
.
Consequently
Linking Words
, the country would survive
water
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 shortage. In conclusion,
overpopulation
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 is one
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
 many reasons that
caused
Wrong verb form
cause
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lack
Correct article usage
a lack
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 of
water
Use synonyms
 globally.
Therefore
Linking Words
, individual should know how to manage their own
water
Use synonyms
 and the authority should provide the law and facility for their resident to save and consume their
water
Use synonyms
 responsibly.

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task achievement
Ensure that all statements are fully developed and supported with specific examples. For instance, when mentioning water management programs, provide concrete examples of what these programs might include and how they have been implemented effectively in other places.
coherence cohesion
Focus on improving sentence structures to make your ideas clearer and easier to follow. For example, avoid overly complex sentences and aim for more direct and concise expressions.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to grammar and word choice. Although I won't deduct points for minor errors, ensuring grammatical accuracy and using precise vocabulary can significantly enhance your writing's clarity and impact.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame the discussion effectively.
task achievement
The task response is mostly complete, addressing the causes of water scarcity and suggesting solutions for both individuals and the government.
relevant specific examples
The main points are relevant and aligned with the essay prompt, making the response pertinent and on-topic.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • water scarcity
  • overconsumption
  • depletion
  • inefficient
  • outdated irrigation
  • climate change
  • potable water
  • water-efficient appliances
  • rainwater harvesting
  • conservation
  • modernizing infrastructure
  • environmental regulations
  • sustainable water management
What to do next:
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