In the future, people may no longer be able to pay for things in shops using cash. All payments may have to be made by card or using phones. Do you think this will happen one day? Why do you thinks some people might not be happy to give up using cash
Nowadays, there are many
ways
for payment like cash
or visa using some apps
on your phone or using new ways
like digital coins that may lead people
in the near future to not use
cash
in their daily life payments. I think most people
will use
their cards
or phones to pay, in this
essay I will discuss these arguments.
There are some arguments that cards
and apps
on smartphones will replace old ways
of Payment such
as cash
because of these reasons, firstly
it is easier to have a card
than to have a wallet with a significant amount of money, moreover
, cards
and smartphones are lighter. Secondly
, it is easy to cancel your card
by calling your bank if something happens for instance
you lose your card
or it has been stolen, that is
why having a card
is better than using cash
to buy your needs.
Although
Some elderly people
do not think it is a good idea to replace cash
with cards
as they are afraid of being hacked by hackers while
they are using it, especially in online stores, moreover
it is hard for them to use
digital apps
to make payments using their phones some already have old phones and these digital apps
need updates regularly for more safety.
In conclusion, nowadays there are many different ways
to pay. While
people
prefer to use
cards
and smartphones rather than cash
, some elderly do not support this
idea, in my opinion, I think it is better to keep both ways
in daily financial dialling.Submitted by waleed.edu11 on
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task achievement
You have provided a clear position on the topic and supported your points with relevant reasons. However, providing more specific examples could further strengthen your argument and provide a more comprehensive response. For instance, you could discuss specific scenarios or provide statistical data to enhance your points.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a logical structure with clear paragraphs that effectively introduce, discuss, and conclude the main points. However, adding transition phrases between paragraphs could improve the flow and coherence of the essay. Additionally, try to avoid repetition of words and phrases for better variety in your writing.
general
Overall, the essay reads well with a clear introduction and conclusion. Ensure that you proofread your work for small grammatical errors and inconsistencies, such as missing articles or slight awkward phrasing, to maintain smooth readability throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Your essay presents a clear and well-structured argument with a concise introduction and conclusion. This helps the reader understand your main points and follow your reasoning.
task achievement
You have provided relevant reasoning and details to support your main points, which demonstrates a strong understanding of the topic and effectively addresses the task.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.