IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Many people choose to learn practical subjects therefore theoretical subjects will be no longer be taught in universities. Do you agree or disagree?.

#people #subjects #universities
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I disagree with the idea that theoretical subjects will
delete
Wrong verb form
be deleted
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in
Change preposition
from
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institute
Add an article
the institute
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. Both theoretical and practical
knowledge
play
Change the verb form
plays
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 a huge role in our study. Many university
students
 today prefer to study because they want to learn by doing something. Theoretical
knowledge
 helps us understand the basic principles.
For instance
, in exact sciences like math and physics, understanding the theory is crucial for making some new discoveries. Practical skills are important for real-life situations. They give us the ability to think on our feet.
For example
, medical
students
 need to learn about the human body before they can perform surgeries.
Likewise
, engineering
students
 must understand material properties before they can design something. Universities want to balance both types of learning.
This
 balance helps
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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 think quickly and solve problems. Without theoretical
knowledge
,
students
 may not understand their fields' depths. Practical skills alone
not
Add a missing verb
are not
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 enough to increase
knowledge
. In conclusion,
while
 practical
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
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 are important, theoretical
knowledge
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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also
 necessary. They work together to provide full education. Universities should continue to teach both theoretical and practical subjects to build the foundation of their
students
'
grate
Correct your spelling
great
show examples
 careers and lives.
Submitted by i.nureddinn on

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task achievement
Ensure that your essay has a clear thesis statement in the introduction. This will make your stance on the topic more evident to the reader. For example, explicitly state that you disagree with the idea that theoretical subjects will be eliminated from universities.
coherence cohesion
While the essay flows logically, consider better transitions between paragraphs for improved coherence. For instance, phrases like 'On the other hand,' 'Additionally,' or 'Moreover' can be useful for this purpose.
task achievement
Although your essay includes relevant examples, it's beneficial to provide more detailed explanations or additional examples to strengthen your arguments. For example, elaborate on how theoretical knowledge can lead to specific innovations or breakthroughs.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in understanding your main argument and summarizes your points well.
task achievement
Both the main body paragraphs focus on distinct points (the importance of theoretical knowledge and the importance of practical skills), which provides a balanced view of the topic.
task achievement
The examples provided (medical students needing theoretical knowledge before practical application, and the balance required in engineering) are relevant and illustrate your points effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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