Some people think that family has the most powerful influence on a child’s development, while others think that other factors such as television, friend, music have the biggest effects. Discuss both views and give your opinion?
Multiple
under-age
criminal accidents are ubiquitous across many regions, indicating unsuitable Correct your spelling
underage
children
development. Change noun form
children's
According to
this
issue, while
some advocate house hold
is the largest factor that tailored kids' traits, others argue that their daily circumstances are the most significant causes. Considering Correct your spelling
household
former
contention, I personally believe both factors contribute to juveniles' characters and will elaborate my Correct article usage
the former
view points
on the matter.
Correct your spelling
viewpoints
Firstly
, family is the first place where children retrieve a
knowledge as a reference to do something. Since youngsters have coping mechanisms, they would reckon their Correct article usage
apply
parents
behaviours are right. Change to a genitive case
parent's
parents'
For instance
, if an adultery person consume
junk beverages around, adolescents would be wondering to attempt it and end with unhealthy lifestyles. For Change the verb form
consumes
this
reasons
, I suggest that as Fix the agreement mistake
reason
a
mature persons, who are responsible and mindful, we have to exhibit Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
a
proper Correct article usage
apply
behavior
for kids, Change the spelling
behaviour
thus
they will grow in the right manner.
Correct word choice
so thus
Secondly
, environment and habits, whether in the long or short term, will gradually affect one's life, including children. To be exact, a child
, who spend their time most to watch Fix the agreement mistake
children
gamer's
Fix the agreement mistake
gamers'
youtube
channel, will Correct your spelling
YouTube
eager
to become a content creator in the future. In Add a missing verb
be eager
the
similar way, juveniles are easily drawn by their peers, whether in Change the article
a
positive
or detrimental way. Add an article
a positive
For instance
, when a
youngsters live in a sporty friendship, they will Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
also
invited to the team to play together. Analysing these tendencies, concerning under-age daily activities and circle
are imperative.
Fix the agreement mistake
circles
To sum up
, while
it back to the Correct word choice
apply
child
decision Change noun form
child's
at
the end. both perspectives, which are aforementioned before, have Change preposition
in
powerful
influence Add an article
a powerful
to
Change preposition
on
child's
growth. Correct article usage
a child's
Subsequently
, thus
as a mature person
we Add a comma
person,
positioned
our kids in the right Wrong verb form
position
circumstance
and show Fix the agreement mistake
circumstances
a
positive behaviours Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
are
really essentialCorrect pronoun usage
that are
,
so that the youngsters will thrive properly.Remove the comma
apply
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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
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task achievement
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coherence cohesion
The essay's structure follows a logical sequence, and each paragraph focuses on a distinct point, contributing to overall coherence.