In most countries, people are allowed to start driving at the age of 18. Some say that the legal driving age should be increased to 21. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
In the modern era, laws are obligatory for the development of the country. In
the
few nations, masses are permitted to ride at the Correct article usage
a
age
of 18. Use synonyms
While
Linking Words
,
some opine that Remove the comma
apply
legal
driving Correct article usage
the legal
age
must increased to 21. Use synonyms
This
essay will analyse both views on Linking Words
above
statement Correct article usage
the above
along with
my opinion in the subsequent paragraphs.
Certainly, an association of multifarious reasons behind using vehicles at 18. Linking Words
However
, first and foremost is maturity and responsibility. To explain it more, teenagers at 18 become mature and capable Linking Words
to contemplate
commendable avenues for themselves. Change preposition
of contemplating
Moreover
, a sense of responsibility Linking Words
inculcates
in them towards Wrong verb form
is inculcated
the
society Correct article usage
apply
as well as
citizens. At Linking Words
this
point, they start to become independent by scrutinising all fields of life. In the 2019 survey, around 60% of USA students are allowed to use personal transport, Linking Words
thus
they become autonomous and overcome the encumber from their parents.
On the paradoxical side, another factor Linking Words
that is
worth mentioning is Linking Words
Correct article usage
the ulilization
ulilization
of vehicles at the Correct your spelling
utilization
age
of 21, Use synonyms
while
the prominent is lack of experience and Linking Words
chlurish
. To elaborate on it, some demographers contend that Correct your spelling
cherish
driving
Correct article usage
the driving
age
should Use synonyms
Add a missing verb
be scalated
scalated
in order to minimise Correct your spelling
escalated
accidents
rates as teenagers lack basic fundamental laws. Change the noun form
accident
Further
, it is Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
a
supstenial
threat to the safety of Correct your spelling
substantial
populance
. Individuals Correct your spelling
populace
of
above 20 become capable Change preposition
apply
to curb
the obstacles Change preposition
of curbing
by
intellectual and physical strength. Change preposition
with
For instance
, Linking Words
according to
Linking Words
2022
survey in India, Correct article usage
a 2022
offsprings
Fix the agreement mistake
offspring
deem
to Wrong verb form
deemed
do racing
with other peers under adolescence, Wrong verb form
race
therefore
around 40% Linking Words
accidents
occur Change preposition
of accidents
due to
their negligence.
In conclusion, in my Linking Words
opinion
government should take steps to limit Add a comma
opinion,
driving
Correct article usage
the driving
age
as learners are incapable Use synonyms
to understand
the importance of civility. They must stern the rules and impose Change preposition
of understanding
finest
on the Correct article usage
the finest
under
Correct your spelling
underage
age
persons to ensure Use synonyms
security
of the country.Add an article
the security
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task achievement
Your essay addresses both views as required by the task, and you have provided your own opinion in the conclusion. However, you should ensure that each point is more clearly linked to the opposing view and the conclusion for better overall coherence.
coherence cohesion
While your introduction clearly sets out the topic and your conclusion provides a summary of your view, some of the body paragraphs lack logical flow and topic sentences. Ensure each paragraph starts with a clear topic sentence and logically progresses to support your view.
coherence cohesion
There are a few inaccuracies and awkward phrasing in your language use, such as 'supstenial' (should be 'substantial') and 'chlurish' (perhaps meant 'churlish'). Try to proofread your work to avoid these errors and to improve readability.
task achievement
Some of your examples, like the surveys, add credible points to your arguments. However, the examples should be better integrated and explained to clarify their relevance to the essay argument.
task achievement
Your essay provides a clear introduction to the topic and states the intention to discuss both views before presenting your own opinion.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion does summarize your viewpoint effectively, reinforcing your stance and providing closure to the essay.