Many offenders commit more crimes after serving the first punishment. Why is this happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem?
Nowadays, most
of
Change preposition
apply
the
felons after serving their time in jail tend to break more laws. There are several causes contributing to Correct article usage
apply
this
trend, as well as
some solutions to this
matter.
To begin
with, many individuals find it hard to accept ex-inmates into society due to
the social stigma. Not to mention
, job opportunities that might be difficult for those with criminal records. On top of that, housing and other loan also
become tiresome. This
results in more crime will be occurred
in order to provide for themselves or their families. Wrong verb form
occurring
In addition
, people with mental health issues or addiction problems also
can commit more sinners because of a lack of support
in the communities. For instance
, a person with a mental disorder, namely bipolar will act differently from normal people because they are not stable. Subsequently
, this
leads to more violent
.
Replace the word
violence
On the other hand
, the government plays a big role in ensuring the safety of people in the country. Therefore
, rehabilitation programs must be provided to those ex-convicts so that they can improve and change, meanwhile helping them reintegrate into society. Next,
the authority should also
establish a job scheme for ex-inmates. By doing this
, both parties will have their benefits and illegal acts can be reduced. Lastly
, the family and the public support
are also
vital, thus
this
can help a person to overcome their past. For example
, a former felon named Jeff Henderson who has served a decade in prison for cocaine is now known as a famous chef in Las Vegas. Therefore
, support
and love can change a person.
In conclusion, Correct article usage
the lacks
lacks
of Correct subject-verb agreement
lack
support
, the social stigma that leads to absence
of a career and mental illness, all can be managed with the aid of the government, family, and the public. Add an article
the absence
an absence
Therefore
, It is important to be taken care of before more crimes are committed and for the safety of the population.Submitted by tifjong on
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coherence cohesion
Try to arrange your points in a clear and logical sequence. Including clear topic sentences and transitions between paragraphs can make your arguments easier to follow. For example, the paragraph about mental health could be linked more clearly to how lack of support leads to reoffending.
task achievement
While your essay is comprehensive, expanding on some points with more detailed explanations and examples can strengthen your response. For instance, elaborating more on how social stigma affects ex-convicts would add depth to your essay.
task achievement
You've addressed both parts of the question thoroughly, examining both reasons for reoffending and suggesting measures to tackle it.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames your argument well.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic
Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.
You essay structure should look something like this:
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – Problems
- Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- One of the first problems of the...
- Another problem that needs to be considered...
- A possible solution to this problem would be...
- One immediate practical solution is to...