You recently stayed hotel for a conference with you company and there were problems with your room Write the hotel management to complain. Include ●where you stayed ●what the problems were ●how the can fix your complaints

Dear Sir or Madam I am writing to
complaint
Replace the word
complain
show examples
about room 40A fourth floor which I stayed
your
Change preposition
at your
show examples
hotel on
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
August
Change preposition
of August
show examples
,
,
Change the punctuation
apply
show examples
Blue Moon" in Oxford Street. Your hotel
surrounding
Wrong verb form
is surrounded
show examples
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
beautiful nature and the first time I saw it, I felt
enjoy
Wrong verb form
enjoyed
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, I faced to face
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
different problems in my room. The first problem is that the water system didn't work well in the bathroom.
Secondly
Linking Words
, whenever we ordered food, the assistants brought it almost 1 hour later.
In
Linking Words
addition
Add a comma
addition,
show examples
your assistants didn't provide good service
such
Linking Words
as rude. I would be grateful if you could pay attention
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
quality of your service and solve problems. I deserve an apology and appropriate compensation for being sick
as a result
Linking Words
water system problem. I look forward to hearing from you and receiving
full
Add an article
a full
show examples
refund.
Your
Correct the word
Yours
show examples
faithfully

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
The introduction does well to state the purpose of the letter, but it contains some grammatical issues. Words such as 'complaint' should be 'complain' and 'I faced to face' should be 'I faced' for better clarity.
task achievement
The main points are supported by examples, but they can be elaborated further for clarity. For instance, providing more details on how the water system affected your stay would be beneficial.
coherence cohesion
The essay needs a more organized structure. The sentences within paragraphs can be more logically connected. For example, the second problem about the food service can be described in more detail and connected better with the overall service problem.
task achievement
Improve the conclusion by specifying what exact form of compensation you seek, whether it’s a refund, a complimentary stay, or another form of compensation. This will show clear and comprehensive ideas.
task achievement
The letter covers all the essential points necessary for a complaint: where you stayed, what the problems were, and how they can address your complaints.
coherence cohesion
The tone remains formal and polite throughout the letter, which is appropriate for this type of communication.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: