Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest ways that governments and individuals can tackle these problems.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

These days, excessive globalisation in cities has been a serious issue.

To begin

Linking Words

, the legal authority and households have

responsibility

Add an article

a responsibility

the responsibility

show examples

to solve

this

Linking Words

problem.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss issues and solutions of overcrowding in the major city respectively.

The overpopulation

Correct article usage

Overpopulation

show examples

can lead to

Remove the article

apply

show examples

enormous unemployment in urban

areas

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, studies said, South Korea reached 20% of the unemployment rate in Seoul. It exhibits that

an overcrowding households

Correct the article-noun agreement

overcrowding households

an overcrowding household

show examples

may yield

to reduce

Change the verb form

reduced

show examples

job

Use synonyms

opportunities

Use synonyms

because of

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

high competition during

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

job

Use synonyms

application, leading to a decrease in disposable income for individuals.

Thus

Linking Words

, they will have

Remove the article

apply

show examples

low confidence

Change preposition

show examples

spending money on the economy, yielding to deteriorated GDP from a low spending power.

Therefore

Linking Words

, the cycle of losing

job

Use synonyms

opportunities

Use synonyms

will be repeated in

following

Correct article usage

the following

show examples

years.

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

can be solved by the legislation set by the

government

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

, the

government

Use synonyms

can invest

Change preposition

show examples

different infrastructures

such

Linking Words

as schools and buildings in rural

areas

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

can encourage

migration

Correct article usage

the migration

show examples

of people from urban

areas

Use synonyms

to rural

areas

Use synonyms

due to

Linking Words

growing development.

Hence

Linking Words

, it will create

job

Use synonyms

opportunities

Use synonyms

in both

areas

Use synonyms

simutaneously

Correct your spelling

simultaneously

that

benefits

Correct subject-verb agreement

benefit

show examples

the economy significantly.

Lastly

Linking Words

, the economy will grow

Change preposition

apply

show examples

overall

Linking Words

after the intervention by the

government

Use synonyms

from an increase in aggregate demand. In conclusion, a

significant

Change the adjective

significantly

show examples

growing population can interrupt

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society from widening

job

Use synonyms

opportunities

Use synonyms

Linking Words

however

Add a comma

however,

show examples

the

government

Use synonyms

can resolve a solution to decrease the level of population in the main city.

Overpopulaiton

Correct your spelling

Overpopulation

is not a dramatic problem as long as the

government

Use synonyms

supports

from

Correct pronoun usage

it from

show examples

sufficient

Correct article usage

a sufficient

show examples

budget.

az7082687Mon Aug 05 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Your essay addresses the task adequately, identifying one major problem—unemployment due to overpopulation—and suggests a government-based solution. However, the examples and points could be better developed. Try to provide more specific examples and statistics to strengthen your argument.

coherence

While your essay is generally well-organized, the transition between ideas could be smoother. For example, the paragraph on unemployment lacks a clear topic sentence. Additionally, the solution paragraph could conclude with a summary sentence to reinforce the argument.

cohesion

Some sentences have minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Also, be consistent in the usage of terms; for example, you alternate between 'overpopulation' and 'overcrowding.' Maintaining consistency will improve readability.

coherence

You have a clear structure with an introduction, body, and conclusion, which helps organize your ideas effectively.

task achievement

You address both the problem and provide a solution, showing a balanced approach to the essay topic.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – Problems
Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

One of the first problems of the...
Another problem that needs to be considered...
A possible solution to this problem would be...
One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

253 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

strain on infrastructure
public services
overcrowded
inadequate healthcare services
pressure on educational institutions
environmental impact
increased pollution
waste management
destruction of green spaces
natural habitats

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Present a written argument or case to an educated non-specialist audience on the following topic: Some employers reward members of staff for their exceptional contribution to the company by giving them extra money. This practice can act as an incentive for some but may also have a negative impact on others. To what extent is this style of management effective? Are there better ways of encouraging employees to work hard?
There are many conflicting opinions on giving money to deserving employees when they make great contributions to the company. This may work to a certain extent, bringing a whole variety of interests. Besides, I would argue that there are superior ways to reward agents.
6
band
Write a letter to your supervisor requesting to change your work schedule. In your letter: - explain current schedule; - why you want to change it; - say what kind of schedule you need.
I am writing you to request a change to my shift schedule from 5-12 o'clock to 12 -17 o'clock. I underwent knee reconstruction surgery and require daily physiotherapy at the local clinic from 9 to 11 a.m. I have annexed the medical documents supporting my request.
8
band
Watching a live performance such as a play, concert or sporting event is more enjoyable than watching the same event on TV. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
It is an irrefutable fact that entertainment is one of the most common needs for nowadays living standards. There is a general claim that live events are better than shows that are being cast on TV. From my personal perspective, I support this idea on the basis of the following grounds.
6.5
band
Last week you were on a flight to London. Unfortunately, when you got off the plane, you left a bag there. You did not remember about the bag until you got to your hotel. Write a letter to the airline. In your letter •explain what has happened •describe the bag and its contents •say what you would like them to do about this problem You should write at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Sir or Madam
I hope this letter finds you well. I am writing to notify that I left my bag in the flight last week which took off on Saturday. It was a flight from Toronto to London with flight number 277AC. Unfortunately, I was busy thinking about something and I didn't realize that it was sitting on the seat as I picked it up out but forgot to bring it with me while going outside.
8.5
band
Scientists tell us some activities are good for health, and others are bad. Despite knowing that millions of people continue doing unhealthy activities. What are the causes, and what are the solutions?
Many people do not follow the instructions of prominent scientists about a healthy lifestyle, thus, reducing their lives drastically. In this essay, I will outline some reasons for such a phenomenon, followed by possible measures to prevent this spread of unscrupulous behaviours.

Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest ways that governments and individuals can tackle these problems.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Write a letter to your supervisor requesting to change your work schedule. In your letter: - explain current schedule; - why you want to change it; - say what kind of schedule you need.

Watching a live performance such as a play, concert or sporting event is more enjoyable than watching the same event on TV. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Scientists tell us some activities are good for health, and others are bad. Despite knowing that millions of people continue doing unhealthy activities. What are the causes, and what are the solutions?