Some people think that schools should prioritize teaching students’ practical skills for the workplace, while others believe that schools should focus on academic subjects such as science and math. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Some believe that schools must focus on delivering practical
skills
to their students
, while
other people would argue that they should concentrate on academic-based subjects like biology and math. Although
basic science
classes will increase their general knowledge
and enhance their searchability, I believe practical skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
is
what they need in the Correct subject-verb agreement
are
future
, because nowadays employers are searching for individuals with excellent practical abilities.
On the one hand, science
subjects will provide students
with basic information that can be built on in the future
. By making them aware of basic math equations and science
discoveries, they will be able to use these rules and theories in the Replace the word
scientific
future
. This
information will answer their enquiries and help them as starting points for further
future
research and investigation. For example
, many great innovations like turbines started when scientists had previous knowledge
about these appliances from their academic backgrounds. However
I believe, academic knowledge
will not make a big difference against practical capability.
On the other hand
, practical knowledge
is a power these days. Major companies are avoiding
any applicant Wrong verb form
avoid
that
does not have practical experience, even if he Correct pronoun usage
who
came
from a strong academic background. By providing Wrong verb form
comes
students
with practical information they will need in the future
they will have a better chance to be hired. For example
, many developed countries started delivering practical courses during summers and opened part-time job opportunities to increase students
' practical performance. I believe in this
way of teaching because it seems much acceptable
in the job market these days.
In conclusion, Correct quantifier usage
more acceptable
Although
delivering basic science
subjects to students
will enlarge their general knowledge
and enhance their searching skills
, I believe these days practical skills
are more useful,
because the job market is looking for experiences and Remove the comma
apply
skills
rather than degreesSubmitted by
on
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task achievement
Your essay effectively addresses the task by discussing both views and providing your own opinion. Ensure to maintain balance by perhaps expanding a bit more on the other viewpoint for completeness.
coherence cohesion
Try to refine transitions between paragraphs a bit more to enhance the flow of your essay. Words like 'Moreover,' 'Additionally,' or 'In contrast,' can help to make connections clearer.
task achievement
Consider providing more varied examples or evidence to support each main point more comprehensively. This will enhance the depth of your discussion.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear and comprehensive structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion that neatly wraps up your argument.
task achievement
Your ideas are clearly presented and supported with relevant examples, which is crucial for a high task response score.
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