In many countries nowadays,more and more women have full-time jobs as men,so there is logic men and women should share the housework tasks equally(like cleaning and looking after children).To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #women #jobs #men #logic #housework #tasks #children

Today,

increasing

Add an article

an increasing

show examples

number of

women

are employed as opposed to previous days.

Therefore

responsibilites

Correct your spelling

responsibilities

house

Add an article

the house

show examples

such

as child care and chores, must be carried out by both wife and husband. I totally agree with

this

view. In

marriage

, these duties

are not belong

Change the verb form

do not belong

show examples

to one person and without helping each other,

marriage

cannot

last

long.

Marriage

is a small establishment that requires sharing everything whether it be joy or struggles. There are many handicaps in daily life that make it hard to sustain

partnership

Fix the agreement mistake

partnerships

show examples

This

sentitive

Correct your spelling

sensitive

balance can only be set up by mutual understanding. So,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

if the purpose is

same

Correct article usage

the same

show examples

, why workshare cannot be equal?

Moreover

, there is a belief that 'men's and

women

's responsibilities are different'.

This

view is not valid anymore as

women

are

also

participating

work

Change preposition

in work

show examples

life. If

wife

Correct article usage

the wife

show examples

contribute

Change the verb form

contributes

show examples

to the home economy,

husband

Add an article

the husband

a husband

show examples

can wash the dishes.

Furthermore

while

working itself can be overwhelming, adding all house responsibilities may turn one partner's life into hell. It would be exhausting to do both inside and outside work. Over time,

person

Add an article

the person

a person

show examples

who shoulders all

responsibility

Correct article usage

the responsibility

show examples

may face serious mental issues

such

as depression and anxiety.

This

mental state impairs the

marriage

Besides

, not shared responsibilities cannot be carried out duly. A working woman,

for instance

, may forget to take her child from school.

Hence

, dreamlike marriages

faces

Change the verb form

face

show examples

inevitable

Correct article usage

an inevitable

show examples

end. In conclusion, all home duties must be shared by each partner since

women

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

become a

contrubutor

Correct your spelling

contributor

household

Correct article usage

the household

show examples

economy.

Due to

the fact that these

responsibles

Correct your spelling

responsibilities

being

Wrong verb form

are

show examples

mutual, they have to be shared equally for the sake of

marriage

Submitted by TUTOO on Tue Aug 06 2024

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clear comprehensive ideas

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logical structure

Make sure each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next. Using linking words and phrases more effectively could improve the flow of your essay.

complete response

The essay provides a complete response to the task prompt.

introduction conclusion present

You have a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which effectively presents your argument.

relevant specific examples

You have included relevant and specific examples to support your points, which strengthens your arguments.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

265 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In many countries nowadays,more and more women have full-time jobs as men,so there is logic men and women should share the housework tasks equally(like cleaning and looking after children).To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Your local newspaper is offering an award for people who have helped the community. Write a letter to the newspaper editor. In your letter

increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems.

Children are now less active in their free time than in the past. Therefore,sport lessons must be compulsory in school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

A person's worth nowadays, seems to be judged according to social statues and material possession. Old- fashion values such as honor, kindness and trust no longer seem important. Do what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development ?