IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The plans below show the site of an airport now and how it will look after redevelopment next year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

#plans #show #site #airport #redevelopment #year #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The
plan
 illustrates current and future blueprints of Southwest
airport
Capitalize word
Airport
show examples
.
Overall
, on a high note, there is an increase in the number of gates and improvement in the facilities that are available for the
passengers
.
To begin
 with current
plan
, includes one café shop and check-in counter for the
passengers
,
while
 the future
plan
 includes 2 cafes in the departures and arrival building. Another change is introducing a bag drop section in the new
plan
whereas
 the current
plan
 does not have
this
 service. In the redevelopment, there is an ATM and car hire facilities introduced for the
passengers
 at their arrivals and these are present in the arrival building itself for easy access.
Along with
 these sky trains are introduced for the travel compute for the gates
this
 was
due to
 the increase in the number of gates from 8 to 18 in the new
plan
.
In contrast
 former
plan
 includes a few
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
walkways
instead
 of a sky train.
In addition
 to other improvements, shops were
also
 introduced for the departure
passengers
.
Submitted by nlchiranth11 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
The essay covers most of the main features of the airport redevelopment, but it could have been more detailed. Likewise, explicitly compare and contrast all aspects mentioned in the plans to further improve the completeness of your response.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a logical flow, but it could benefit from clearer paragraph separation, especially between different features of the redevelopment. Ensure each new idea related to a specific feature is presented cohesively to enhance the reader's understanding.
task achievement
Good attempt at summarizing and comparing the main features of the current and future airport plans.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a logical structure and includes relevant comparisons.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • terminal
  • runway
  • refurbishment
  • redevelopment
  • amenities
  • car park
  • hangar
  • concourse
  • public transport hub
  • access roads
  • boarding gates
  • check-in desk
  • baggage claim
  • departure lounge
  • observation deck
  • duty-free shopping
What to do next:
Look at other essays: