You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. While many people go to university for academic study, more people should be encouraged to do vocational training because there is a lack of qualified workers such as electricians and plumbers. Do you agree or disagree? You should write at least 250 words.
The assertion that people should be encouraged to pursue vocational training rather than go to university for academic
study
is a considerable topic of discussion. Many people argue that there is a lack of qualified tradespeople like electricians, carpenters and plumbers. This
has nothing but significant implications on
society. I personally believe that vocational training is as important as academic Change preposition
for
study
.
Many countries across the globe is
experiencing Change the verb form
are
shortage
of qualified workers.Add an article
a shortage
This
is leading to increased costs and delay
in delivering and maintenance of the projects. Correct subject-verb agreement
delays
For instance
,in the UK, the shortage of electricians has led to higher wages for those in profession
creating Correct article usage
the profession
demand-supply
gap. Add an article
a demand-supply
the demand-supply
This
is one of the principle
reasons for promoting vocational training.
Correct your spelling
principal
Moreover
, vocational training provides a
viable and lucrative career options for those who are not interested in academic Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
study
. Not every one
can excel in academics. Vocational training provides a good hands-on approach to learning. Replace the word
everyone
For example
, there are certain internships in trade such
as plumbing or carpentry that provide the opportunity to
students to earn Change preposition
for
while
they learn, gaining valuable work experience along with
financial independence. This
can be particularly beneficial to those from disadvantaged background
, providing them with Fix the agreement mistake
backgrounds
secure
stable background.
Add an article
a secure
However
, there should be a balance between vocational as well as
academic training. While
promoting vocational training is important, it should not come at the cost of academic study
. Both paths are essential and serve different roles within society. A diverse workforce that includes both educated professionals and skilled tradespeople is vital for well-rounded
and functional economy.
In conclusion, I agree that more people should be encouraged to take the path of vocational training. Add an article
a well-rounded
This
will definitely help in providing the
suitable career options to those who are not inclined towards academic Correct article usage
apply
study
. Additionally
, this
will contribute to economic growth by maintaining critical infrastructures.Submitted by bhutani.trisha09 on
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task response
Your essay addresses the task effectively. However, ensure to elaborate on how vocational training can address specific shortages in various sectors.
coherence cohesion
While the overall structure of your essay is logical, try to create smoother transitions between paragraphs to improve the overall flow.
task response
Consider using a broader range of specific examples to strengthen your arguments further.
task response
Revise minor grammatical errors to improve readability (e.g., 'countries is experiencing' should be 'countries are experiencing').
coherence cohesion
Your introduction clearly sets the stage for the discussion, and your conclusion effectively summarizes your stance.
coherence cohesion
The main points are supported with appropriate examples, leading to a coherent argument.
task response
You have intelligently highlighted the importance of balance between vocational and academic pathways, showing a nuanced understanding of the topic.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example