Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, the question of changing financial support to another type of help for poorer
countries
from wealthy ones becomes a field for debate, because today's measures are not helping to solve poverty. I, personally, can strongly agree with the idea of replacing existing ways with more effective strategies in terms of providing sustainable economics for third-world countries
and limited resources.
To really improve the current situation the best decision is to make a long-lasting strategy, that will offer a poorer country an opportunity to become fully independent one day. Firstly
, there is a need to find a country's own resources, that can help to build a strong economy. It could be minerals, fertile soil or even tourism. For instance
, OAE was also
in misery before there was found a local oil field. Secondly
, it is necessary to teach people how to maintain these resources and send professionals, who could teach them.
Another reason to change the way of treatment in those countries
is that sending financial aid is also
harmful to the giving side. Although
other types of help could be more expensive, they are also
more productive. Furthermore
, in 10 years the country will be stable and you will not need to send money again. A great example is Bali, in the last
decade this
island has decreased the level of poverty through successful tourism campaigns.
In conclusion, I can't agree with the statement about keeping international politics in the same spot and not providing other opportunities to fulfil the economic starvation of poor countries
.Submitted by sofakruglova2002 on
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task achievement
Try to elaborate more on each argument to provide a clearer and more detailed analysis. For instance, explain more fully how teaching people to maintain resources would work and what specific benefits it would bring.
task achievement
Ensure that your ideas are well-developed and avoid overly general statements. Providing more specific examples and data can enhance your arguments’ effectiveness.
coherence cohesion
Maintain unity and ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea. This helps in avoiding cohesion issues and makes your views clearer and more organized.
coherence cohesion
Try to use a variety of cohesive devices and linking words to improve the flow between and within paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
The essay generally maintains a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, helping the reader follow your argumentation.
task achievement
Specific examples like OAE and Bali are effective in illustrating your points and adding depth to your arguments.