Below is a map of the city of Brandfield. City planners have decided to build a new shopping mall for the area, and two sites, S1 and S2 have been proposed.

The map illustrates the
city
of Brandfield, including the golf course, park,
city
centre, and industrial
estate
.
To begin
, the area of S1 and S2 have been suggested to be used as a new shopping mall.
Firstly
, the housing
estate
is located in the north
site
Correct your spelling
side
show examples
, which retains the road in the middle, connecting to the south
site
Correct your spelling
side
show examples
. The
city
centre stays in the middle of Brandfield, plus, the river passes through it.
Moreover
, the industrial
estate
is placed in the
south east
Correct your spelling
southeast
show examples
of the town.
Moreover
, the golf course and park take the most of the areas in the
city
by taking place three-tenth of the total.
In addition
, the
city
contains the railway and road. the railway connects the outer areas of the north and south. The new shopping mall can be placed on the S1 since it is in between
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the housing
estate
and
city
centre, so it has the advantage of attracting customers in a close distance.
Submitted by az7082687 on

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task achievement
Make sure to provide a clear conclusion to summarize your points regarding the two proposed sites.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the logical flow by connecting the paragraphs more smoothly, such as using more cohesive devices and phrases.
task achievement
There are a few minor grammatical errors and repetitions that you should try to avoid, such as using 'moreover' twice in a row.
task achievement
You have clearly indicated the locations and features of the map, giving a thorough basis for comparison.
coherence cohesion
The use of specific details like the location of the city center, river, and industrial estate adds clarity to your description.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • urban planning
  • infrastructure
  • residential areas
  • economic impact
  • accessibility
  • traffic congestion
  • public transportation
  • environmental implications
  • sustainability
  • commercial development
  • site comparison
  • local community
  • consumer behavior
  • retail ecosystem
  • zoning regulations
  • footfall
  • parking facilities
  • green spaces
  • land use
  • civic amenities
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