The diagram shows how apple is canned. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
The diagram illustrates the way how
apples
are being canned .
Use synonyms
Overall
, the process consists of 14 stages , beginning with hand-picking and ending with despatch .
Linking Words
To begin
with , in the first stage , Linking Words
apples
are picked from trees by hand and Use synonyms
then
loaded into a container for shipping. Next , Linking Words
apples
are washed with water and Use synonyms
then
checked by Microsoft to determine their quality. In the fifth step , Linking Words
apples
are cooled by a cooling refrigerator and Use synonyms
then
weighed by a spring balance. Linking Words
Furthermore
, after weighing , Linking Words
apples
are cut by an instrument into slices and Use synonyms
then
packed into canes .
Linking Words
Moreover
,in the eleventh stage , packed canes are heated by a microwave oven for sterilization to remove the germs. After being sterilised, cans are labelled with tape and Linking Words
then
in the twelfth stage Linking Words
apples
are stored in a hall. Use synonyms
Finally
, Linking Words
apples
are despatched and distributed to shops .Use synonyms
Submitted by mianraza686 on
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words apples with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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