the digram shows the floor plane of public library 20 yeares ago and how it look now

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The
digram
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diagram
show examples
provides information about the public library
befor
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before
for
20
yeares
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years
show examples
and how it looks
today
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, some space in the
roomes
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rooms
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becaume
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becomes
bigger than
befor
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before
.
Also
Linking Words
,
changed
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changes
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for
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apply
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the
chapes
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shapes
and design of the rooms.
Frist
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First
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of all,
central
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the central
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library 20 years ago
was
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apply
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had tables and chairs in the middle. The enquiry desk now became the cafe.Now
today
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the library
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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a adult
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an adult fiction book
adult fiction books
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fiction
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books
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in addition
Linking Words
,
self-service
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to self-service
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machines.In the
behiend
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behind
the adult
fiction
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books
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, there are lecture
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room
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rooms
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.
However
Linking Words
, replace it
from
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with
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Cds
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CDs
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,videos and
coputer
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computer
games
to
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in
show examples
Correct article usage
the chidren's
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chidren's
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children's
fiction
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books
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room
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.
In addition
Linking Words
,
chidren's
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children's
books
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today
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look
more
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apply
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bigger and add
such
Linking Words
as
,
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apply
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storytelling
event
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events
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and
children'
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children's
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fiction
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books
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. All
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the refrence
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refrence
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reference
books
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, now you can find
it
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them
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between the
children
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children's
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fiction
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books
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and
computer
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the computer
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room
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. The
digram
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diagram
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shows, the
diffrent
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difference
between the computer
room
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have include
Wrong verb form
includes
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CDs,
videos
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and videos
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befor
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before
20
yeares
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years
show examples
ago,
However
Linking Words
,
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
today
Use synonyms
became
Wrong verb form
become
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only
Correct article usage
the only
show examples
computer
room
Use synonyms
and has
specific
Add an article
a specific
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function to
used
Change the form of the verb
use
show examples
.
Submitted by modhialarjani1999 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay needs a clearer structure and logical flow. Consider using paragraphs effectively to separate different parts of the comparison.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that there is a clear introduction and conclusion to frame your essay. This helps in providing a sense of completeness.
task achievement
Focus on supporting your main points with specific details and examples from the diagrams. This will strengthen your arguments and make your ideas more comprehensive.
task achievement
Try to use varied and accurate vocabulary to describe the differences and changes. This will help in making your writing more engaging and clear.
task achievement
Address all aspects of the task. Ensure you cover all significant changes or details in the diagrams to meet the task requirements fully.
task achievement
You made a good attempt at describing the changes in the public library over a span of 20 years. This demonstrates your ability to analyze visual data.
task achievement
Your essay has a decent amount of detail, reflecting an effort to provide a comprehensive description of the floor plan changes.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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