You recently received a letter from a friendasking for advice about whether to goto college or to try to get a job.You think he/she should get a job. Write a letter to this friend.In your letter Say why she/he wouldn't enjoy going to college Explain why getting a job is a good for him/her Suggest types of job that would be suitable for him/her

#advice #goto #college #job #friend #wouldn

Dear Guli I am writing

for

Change preposition

show examples

ask about your study.As you said before you have a problem I

guest

Correct your spelling

guess

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you can't choose.Let me.Help you.You have

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

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2 options going to

college

get

Wrong verb form

getting

show examples

a job. In my point of

view

Add a comma

view,

show examples

you shouldn't go to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

college

.Because you already know 2 languages.You can play any kind of instrument that's why I am offering do you get a job.You have learnt

which are

Verb problem

what

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you need.You don't have to

kill

Verb problem

waste

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

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time at

college

.You are too smart for

college

AsI

Correct your spelling

As I

mentioned before getting a job is

good

Change the article

a good

show examples

idea.Because you can make money.If you start working you will

learn

Add the particle

learn to

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communicate with others easily and

then

you can work on your career.You can find your way to develop. You are

Correct your spelling

show examples

talented and you have a knack for everything I truly believe. I look forward to hearing from you soon. Yours sincerely, Toshtemirova Shakhnoza

Submitted by omondavlat91 on Fri Aug 09 2024

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coherence cohesion

Try to ensure that each paragraph has a single clear idea. This will help make your writing more structured and easier to follow.

task achievement

Make sure to fully justify your opinions. Explain why you think your friend will benefit from getting a job rather than going to college with stronger points and specific examples.

suitable writing tone

The letter has a warm and friendly tone, which is appropriate for this type of correspondence.

greeting and closing

You've included a greeting and a closing, which help make the letter feel complete and polished.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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1Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

149 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some people think that poverty is the reason for most crimes. Do you agree or disagree?

Schools should focus more on teaching students how to be successful in the workforce and less on helping them to achieve academic success. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Computers are being used more and more in education. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages and give your own opinion.

As transport and accommodation problems are increasing in many cities, some governments encourage businesses to move to rural areas. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?