Some people say free time activities for children should be organized by parents. Others say that children should be free to choose what they do in their free time.
People
have different views as to whether organizing recreational activities
is important for children
or if they have to be independent in choosing anything in their free time
. While
there are potential benefits to choosing what to do for children
on their own, I believe that leisure activities
should be chosen for each child by parents
and school teachers.
There are certain benefits for young people
to help them find the right activities
during their free time
from their parents
or school teachers due to
their lack of maturity. Young people
have a tendency to centralize everything, whether it is positive or negative. In other words
, some activities
, such
as playing online games or committing theft without understanding the real consequences, may develop bad behaviors
that become a stumbling block for their prospects. Change the spelling
behaviours
Therefore
, until they become mature enough, school teachers and parents
have to be responsible in terms of directing them to a variety of activities
that are useful for their future lives. For example
, if parents
give advice to play physical and mental games, it can contribute
them maintain a healthy lifestyle and develop cognitive Verb problem
help
skills
, resulting in their overall
well-being.
Young people
also
have the right to be busy with whatever they want. The main reason is that most parents
and others do not know which activity they like, leading to dissatisfaction during their play. More specifically, children
should decide on activities
based on their interests. As long as they spend time
with processes that help them to be happy, a
sense of satisfaction, and the development of a variety of Add a missing verb
have a
skills
such
as critical thinking, emotional, and social skills
through relieving stress and staying strong against mental disorders. Finally
, in terms of the selection, something during free time
has to be up to youngsters.
In conclusion, although
children
can develop a variety of skills
and improve satisfaction, I believe that their lack of maturity often misleads them and may negatively impact their future.Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on
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coherence cohesion
Try to make transitions between ideas smoother. This will make your essay flow better and help the reader follow your arguments more easily.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or case studies to support your points. This will make your arguments stronger and more convincing.
task achievement
Work on the clarity of expression in some sentences to make your ideas more easily understood.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame your arguments well.
task achievement
The essay covers both perspectives effectively, which shows a balanced approach to the topic.
task achievement
You provide relevant reasoning to support your arguments, indicating a good understanding of the topic.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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