1-Museums and art galleries should focus on works that show the history and culture of their own country rather than works of other parts of the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is often argued that museums and
art
galleries should be Add an article
an exhibition
exhibition
of one country's own Fix the agreement mistake
exhibitions
artifacts
and history Change the spelling
artefacts
instead
of showing others. I,
believe diversity in museums Remove the comma
apply
overweighs
the drawbacks of Verb problem
outweighs
former
opinion, Correct article usage
the former
hence
i
disagree with the statement.
Change the capitalization
I
To begin
with, diveristy
can play Correct your spelling
diversity
major
role in educational value. Exhibition of one country's own work can be beneficial for locals as it offers deeper insights Add an article
a major
of
their own heritage, though it can Change preposition
into
be
impact Unnecessary verb
apply
restriction
on tourism. Diversity is the most significant way to promote tourism and Fix the agreement mistake
restrictions
throught
it economic growth can be achieved easily. If Correct your spelling
through
thought
meusums
would Correct your spelling
museums
demonstarte
variety that predominant the factor of global understanding. Correct your spelling
demonstrate
With
Change preposition
This
this
cultural exchange is something that enhances the knowledge and interest in others
history.
Change noun form
others'
other's
Furthermore
, impersonal relations can be strengthen
Change the verb form
be strengthened
up
by showing universal Change preposition
apply
art
. It also
encourage
Change the verb form
encourages
wide
Correct article usage
a wide
prospective
of viewers and Correct your spelling
perspective
beneficial
for global collection. Add a missing verb
is beneficial
Also
, it gives shows a balanced approach where both national and international theme
, Fix the agreement mistake
themes
art
and artifcats
can be shown to the locals and international people. It not only promotes diversity but the wide perspective of people via exchange of thoughts and opinions can enhance comprehension of Correct your spelling
artefacts
wider
range.
Add an article
a wider
To conclude
, knowledge and art
should not be limited to a particular place. The more we share it, the more it spreads and glorifies the beauty.Submitted by simranjit2598 on
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task achievement
Develop ideas more comprehensively and provide concrete examples to support your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure logical flow by clearly connecting ideas and points. Use transitional phrases to link paragraphs and ideas smoothly.
grammar and spelling
Double-check grammar and spelling for a more polished presentation. For instance, 'diveristy' should be 'diversity', and 'meusums' should be 'museums'.
grammar and spelling
Ensure consistency in verb tense and subject-verb agreement. Avoid minor inaccuracies for clearer communication.
structure
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which sets the boundaries and summarizes the arguments.
task achievement
Good effort to address both sides of the argument, which demonstrates a balanced approach.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.