More and more students become unemployed after graduating from university. What are the reasons and solutions for this problem?

Recently, there has been an
icrease
Correct your spelling
increase
in the number of
students
who are unemployed after finishing tertiary education. In
this
essay, I will name some factors that partly contribute to
this
problem and recommend some feasible solutions to tackle
this
issue. One of the
problems
associated with
this
issue is that the university's
programs
are outdated. Almost all teaching materials have been invented for 1 or 2 decades.
Therefore
, these learning
programs
are no longer able to provide knowledge that can match the requirements of modern industries, which contributes to the increasing rate of unemployment. Another problem is that the practical experience of graduates is insufficient. In universities,
students
pay most of their attention to papers and getting
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good
grade
Fix the agreement mistake
grades
show examples
, which leads to a lack of practical experience.
While
employers tend to find applicants who are experienced in their fields.
Besides
all the mentioned
problems
, there are several possible solutions to deal with them.
Firstly
, the curriculum's
programs
need to be updated annually. By updating learning materials,
students
will have more chances to have a good understanding of the latest technologies and knowledge that are useful in the industries.
Therefore
, making them a highly regarded applicant when finding a job.
Secondly
, the university authority should encourage
students
to have an internship.
Becoming
Change preposition
By becoming
show examples
trainees in big companies, learners will have more chances to expose themselves to real-life
problems
related to their fields and modern technologies, which can contribute to their percentages of getting a job. In conclusion, outdated learning
programs
and lacking practical experience are the reasons why graduates find it difficult to find an occupation after
getting
Verb problem
apply
show examples
achieving a formal qualification.
However
, these
problems
can be dealt with by updating teaching materials and providing
internship
Fix the agreement mistake
internships
show examples
for
students
.
Submitted by ieltsamiedu on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

language precision
Ensure that all terms and expressions are used correctly; consider using 'relevant' instead of 'feasible,' and 'programs' instead of 'program's'.
task achievement
Develop each point more fully with additional explanations or examples to enhance clarity and comprehension.
coherence cohesion
Use linking words and cohesive devices more effectively to connect ideas and paragraphs.
task achievement
Good job identifying two main issues and providing solutions that directly address them.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion adequately frame the discussion.
coherence cohesion
Logical organization of ideas with a clear structure that aids understanding.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: