Television dominates the free-time of too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socialising with others. Do you agree or disagree?

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Over the

last

Linking Words

few years, variorum people utilising their available

time

Use synonyms

to watch TV

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

has their lives

become

Fix the infinitive

to become

show examples

sedentary

lifestyle

Fix the agreement mistake

lifestyles

show examples

also

Linking Words

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

become estranged.

However

Linking Words

, spending leisure

time

Use synonyms

watching some beneficial programs

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

wholesome. I strongly agree that it causes detrimental impacts on our minds and well-being.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss my views with supporting proof. On the one hand, television is one of the best ways to spend leisure

time

Use synonyms

In other words

Linking Words

, it is affordable that everyone can acquire

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

to watch divergent sorts of programs without wasting their money on other leisure activities

such

Linking Words

as shopping.

In addition

Linking Words

, there are many educational programs on TV by which our knowledge would be escalated,

also

Linking Words

we can expand our horizons by watching the news, international films and channels from other countries.

For instance

Linking Words

, news keeps us up to date with news from all continents.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, a lot of people are taking advantage of

this

Linking Words

invention by wasting their

time

Use synonyms

media without being involved in society and the world.

For example

Linking Words

, most of the children after school spend their valuable

time

Use synonyms

watching cartoons without showing interest in education.

In addition

Linking Words

, on television plenty of aggressive films that make children disobedient.

As a result

Linking Words

, children can become psycho and cannot control themselves.

To conclude

Linking Words

although

Linking Words

I believe that TV has brought many beneficial values to our lives, the negative impacts outweigh the benefits. People should understand the importance of

time

Use synonyms

and should learn to manage effectively which would benefit them

as well as

Linking Words

society

modermodee7Fri Aug 09 2024

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task achievement

Ensure to develop ideas thoroughly with more specific examples and data. This enhances the depth of your essay and makes your argument more persuasive.

coherence cohesion

Use transitional phrases and linking words more effectively to create a smoother flow between your points. This not only makes your argument clearer but also enhances the coherence of your essay.

coherence cohesion

Make sure each paragraph centers around a single main idea, and avoid drifting into multiple points in one paragraph. This will make your essay clearer and more organized.

introduction conclusion present

Your introduction clearly states your viewpoint and sets the tone for the essay, making it easy for the reader to follow.

complete response

You effectively highlighted both the positive and negative aspects of watching television, showing a balanced perspective.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

257 words

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Television dominates the free-time of too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socialising with others. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe they are entitled to all the money they earn, to spend everything on themselves, instead of paying part of their salaries in taxes to the state. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your own opinion and examples.

Coins and paper money will soon be replaced by credit and back cards. Do you agree or disagree that eventually we will have a cashless society which will be safer and more convenient for everyone?

Although many people value public parks, some argue that this space could be better used for housing or businesses to support the growing population and economy. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people prefer to stay the same type of work all their life, and others prefer to change the type of work. Discuss both sides and state your own opinion.

Robots and artificial intelligence re being developed to replace humans in the workplace. Why is this happening? Do you think this will have a positive or negative impact on society?