Many people say that the only way to guarantee a good job is to complete a course of university education. Others claim that it is better to start work after school and gain experience in the world of work. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

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In many people's belief, there is an inclined preference that securing a good job can
be accomplish
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be accomplished
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by completing a
degree
from
educational
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the educational
an educational
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institution.
However
, others think that the only way to guarantee it is by starting to
work
after school.
Nevertheless
, I agree that getting a college
degree
will likely increase
chances
Correct article usage
the chances
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of getting a desired job. By completing
college
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a college
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degree
in the first place, individuals can be more guaranteed to get a
well
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good
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work
.
For instance
, huge industries majorly are
fulfilled
Verb problem
filled
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with
bachelors
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bachelor's
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and
masters
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master's
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degree
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degrees
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. They often provide several benefits and
developements
Correct your spelling
developments
that may cultivate their employees. Despite
of
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apply
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it
Correct pronoun usage
this
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,
academic
Correct article usage
an academic
show examples
degree
comes with a big tuition over time and a long runway to achieve it, making those who have less amount of money and time
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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hardly
to
Correct word choice
able to
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get it.
On the other hand
, high schoolers who directly
work
after
graduate
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graduation
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will reduce
a
Correct article usage
the
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waste of time
also
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and also
show examples
gain a broader experience.
For instance
, they may have many opportunities to combine both their practical and academic skills as
a
Correct article usage
apply
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fresh start
Add a hyphen
fresh-start
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high school graduates. Nowadays, companies
also
look for individuals who are ready to dive deep into the world of
work
,
making
Verb problem
giving
show examples
the
Correct your spelling
them
show examples
bigger
Correct article usage
a bigger
show examples
chance to
reassure
Verb problem
secure
show examples
jobs. Yet, whether it is beneficial for some people, there are some who are likely unpleasant with their current
work
,
although
it can be considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a good start for them. Taking everything into consideration, I believe that completing university materials and getting a
degree
will likely
enchance
Correct your spelling
enhance
the chance to get a good job.
Submitted by riani.the2 on

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task achievement
Expand more on your main arguments, providing more detailed reasoning or examples to strengthen your task achievement.
coherence cohesion
Ensure smooth transitions between ideas for a more cohesive essay. Use connecting phrases and logical progression.
clear comprehensive ideas
Clarify some points further to enhance the depth of the response, especially in contrasting the two views.
coherence cohesion
You have provided a clear structure with an introduction, body, and conclusion, which is a strong aspect of your essay.
task achievement
The essay addresses both views of the prompt, showing an understanding of the task.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion restates the opinion effectively, reinforcing your position.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • theoretical knowledge
  • critical thinking skills
  • specialized expertise
  • on-the-job training
  • work experience
  • financial independence
  • career growth
  • hands-on experience
  • balanced perspective
  • internships
  • part-time work
  • academic learning
  • vocational training
  • apprenticeships
  • personal circumstances
  • financial constraints
  • career goals
  • individual aptitudes
  • well-paying careers
  • satisfying careers
  • specialized training
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