The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, professors believe that the most important purpose of
science
is to have a beneficial impact and improvement on citizens'
lives
. I totally agree with
this
idea because
people
's
lives
are more crucial than other things. Before enhancing various other objects of
science
, individuals have to take care of their health and
lives
. If the first crucial aim of
science
should not be to increase citizens'
lives
, it will affect not just
people
's
lives
, but
also
other facilities of
science
. It means that there will be a lack of scientists or professors who can assist in improving general
science
;
however
, they need to take care of their
lives
by upgrading just certainly
science
objects that are required to improve humanity's life.
For instance
, scientists can first increase needed technology
such
as surgical chairs, and so on in order to improve the population of
people
.
Moreover
, if a country has a lot of humans, it would provide the opportunity to gain a
plenty
Correct word choice
large
show examples
amount of well-educated scientists who will continue to support other scientific goals.
However
, there are a number of reasons why it can affect negatively.
Firstly
, it is logical that it will cost a plethora of money to try to improve everyone's
lives
.
For example
, governments should upgrade some technology, knowledge, instruments and so on, which demand a tremendous amount of money.
Secondly
, it will take a long time to normalise all
this
;
thus
,
people
will try to make it faster than the allotted time which can lead to more problems.
Nevertheless
, I believe that these problems are not that important as they will all get fixed after a
while
. In conclusion, I completely believe that experts have the ability to put improving
people
's
lives
at the centre of
science
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because by doing
this
they can
also
increase other objects of
science
.
Submitted by talgattan4ez on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Try to strengthen your main points with more specific and relevant examples. This would make your arguments more compelling.
coherence cohesion
While the overall argument is clear, work on making the logical flow between paragraphs smoother. Use transitional phrases to link ideas effectively.
coherence cohesion
You provided a clear introduction and a concise conclusion, capturing the essence of your argument.
task achievement
Your response is comprehensive and effectively addresses the prompt.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • technological advancements
  • medical discoveries
  • life-changing inventions
  • innovations
  • solutions to human problems
  • enhancing quality of life
  • improvement of healthcare
  • transportation
  • communication
  • agriculture
  • energy sectors
  • eradication of diseases
  • prolongation of life expectancy
  • global challenges
  • climate change
  • overpopulation
  • food security
  • developed world
  • underprivileged communities
What to do next:
Look at other essays: