IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8.5

Your English-speaking friend who lives in your town has asked for your advice about learning a new sport. Write an email to your friend. In your letter, recommend a new sport that would be suitable for your friend to learn explain how your friend could learn this sport suggest that you both learn this sport together

Dear Mary, I am happy to learn that you would like to join a sports club in our city. It is my great pleasure to share my experiences with you in
this
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 regard. First of all, there is a nice and modern swimming pool in our neighbourhood which has been renewed recently and equipped with some fitness devices in the pool.
Moreover
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, the coach is fluent in English and can assist you in the learning process easily. I can remember
last
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 week you told me that you need some activities which decrease your stress level. I am sure that
such
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 water sports can have a positive impact on your anxiety and can elevate your mood.
Furthermore
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, I
also
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 would like to register myself for
this
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 sport class. If you agree, both of us can participate in
this
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 class with each other. Please let me know what you think in
this
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 regard.I am looking forward to hearing from you soon. Best wishes, ZM

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task achievement
Consider providing a specific recommendation or reason why swimming is a good sport for Mary, based on her interests or physical condition.
coherence cohesion
Add one more paragraph to make the explanation even clearer, and ensure that each idea is fully expanded upon. For example, you can explain more about the fitness devices or the benefits of swimming.
task achievement
The writing tone is friendly and approachable, very suitable for writing to a friend.
coherence cohesion
The letter has a logical structure and flows well from one point to the next.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • advice
  • recommend
  • suitable
  • learn
  • coach
  • lessons
  • tutorial videos
  • practice
  • tennis club
  • group
  • schedule
  • regularly
  • participants
  • tournaments
  • friendly matches
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