In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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There are many tactics employed by commercial enterprises in the twenty-first century's

competetive

Correct your spelling

competitive

global market. Many

refuge

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refer

show examples

to targeted advertisements suggesting their devices

posses

Correct your spelling

possess

show examples

a more advanced feature that was not available before.

This

Linking Words

technique can be aiming to improve their

selling

Replace the word

sales

show examples

performance and in my

opinion

Add a comma

opinion,

show examples

comprises an immense drawback for the citizens. On the one hand, businesses are keen to insist that their products have newly introduced characteristics in order to increase their sales target and appeal to higher numbers of customers.

For example

Linking Words

everytime

Replace the word

every time

show examples

Apple releases new versions of

iphones

Correct your spelling

iPhones

phones

, brands them not only as containing updated gadgets but

also

Linking Words

few

Correct article usage

a few

show examples

modern features.

Furthermore

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

commercial strategy results in a vast range of enthusiasm among people leading to tremendous marketing and

sale

Fix the agreement mistake

sales

show examples

success for the company.

On the other hand

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

constitutes a negative business trend owing to several malicious ramifications in terms of

pecuniary

Correct article usage

the pecuniary

show examples

well-being of the customers. Considering

this

Linking Words

marketing policy, more and more consumers tend to spend their hard-earned financial resources and

acumulated

Correct your spelling

accumulated

accumulate

savings on upgraded versions of consumer goods,

for instance

Linking Words

Moreover

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

is a

tremenously

Correct your spelling

tremendously

hazardous phenomenon as it can bring about citizens taking loans with high interest rates, using up their credit cards to the ceiling or even risk going bankrupt or delinquent if they act heedlessly or fail to pay back

on-time

Correct your spelling

on time

show examples

. In conclusion, enterprises consider all sorts of advertising strategies

such

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as labelling their product as having new features to seduce people into purchasing them. I wholeheartedly regard it as an enormous negative development

due to

Linking Words

the devastating financial

reprecussions

Correct your spelling

repercussions

for the ordinary people that are attached to

this

Linking Words

sales policy.

sajjad.talebi2020Sun Aug 11 2024

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grammar vocabulary

There are notable minor spelling and grammatical issues such as 'competetive', 'refuge', 'devices posses', 'pecuniary well-being', 'acumulated savings', 'tremenously hazardous', and 'reprecussions'. Paying attention to these minor errors can enhance the overall fluency and coherence of your writing.

coherence cohesion

While the essay is logically structured, ensure your transition phrases are varied. For instance, you could use synonyms or different structures to avoid repetition of 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand'. This will enhance the flow of your essay.

task achievement

Although your arguments are sound and well-explained, make sure each one is directly linked to the topic. Try to avoid long-winded explanations and get straight to the point more quickly to maintain the reader's attention.

coherence cohesion

You've clearly structured the essay with an introduction, body, and conclusion, which makes it easy to follow.

task achievement

Your arguments are strong and supported by relevant examples, like the reference to Apple's product marketing strategies.

task achievement

You’ve effectively explained the possible negative implications of advertising strategies focused on the 'newness' of products, showing clear and comprehensive ideas.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

272 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

emphasise
advertising
products
innovation
competitive strategy
consumer dissatisfaction
value

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In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Nowadays automation is being used to drive cars. Why do you think this is happening? Is this a positive or a negative development?

in many counties, people now wear western-style dresses such as suits and jeans rather than traditional clothing. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development?

In some countries, younger people are neglecting their right to vote. What problems does this cause and what are some of the possible solutions?