1.- It has been suggested that cars and public transport should be banned from city centres and only bicycles be allowed instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

A certain group of
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
agrees on
disappearing
Verb problem
removing
show examples
public
transportation
and
cars
from the
city
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
with the idea of allowing only bikes.
This
essay completely disagrees with
this
statement since most of the
people
who live in the
city
center depend on
cars
and public
transportation
to move to different places being their main or unique way of transport and not all of the citizens possess the knowledge of how to ride a bike or are able to learn. One of the main reasons why
this
essay totally disagrees with disappearing public
transportation
and vehicles
such
as
cars
is because these are the primary and sometimes
only
Add an article
the only
show examples
mode of
transportation
of most of the
population
in different
city
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
.
Everyday
Correct word choice
People
show examples
people
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
different ages (school kids, working adults, seniors, among others) need to travel to short or
long distance
Add a hyphen
long-distance
show examples
places.
This
happens thanks to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public
transportation
or own vehicles that allow citizens to get to their destiny safely and on time.
For example
, I currently live in the suburb of Neutral Bay and need to travel
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
to Bondi where the childcare centre where I work resides.
Therefore
, in the mornings I take a bus which brings me to my working place in only 30 minutes. Another reason why I disagree with the previous idea is that
although
many
people
would love to ride a bike,
unfortunately
Add the comma(s)
unfortunately,
show examples
they do not have the skills to do it. Plenty of
this
population
did not get proper instruction on how to ride a bike during their childhood or adolescence making it even more difficult to learn the skills at an advanced age or being in possession of enough time to do it.
For example
, most senior (not most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
) citizens, who merely depend on public transport or vehicles to move to different places, would find it pretty difficult and even unsafe
in becoming
Change preposition
to become
show examples
competent enough to transport themselves
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
bicycles. In conclusion,
although
banning
cars
and public
transportation
from
city
centres
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
been advised, I totally disagree with
this
idea since it is the primary way of
transportation
for most (not
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
most) of the
population
and not all
people
possess the skills or have the opportunity to become proficient enough to only ride bikes.
Submitted by nila.hiperu on

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task achievement
To improve task achievement, ensure to further develop each argument with more specific examples and explore counterarguments. This will make your essay more comprehensive and balanced.
coherence and cohesion
For better coherence, use a variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas smoothly. This will help to avoid repetition and make the essay flow more naturally.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear position right from the introduction and maintains it throughout the essay, which shows a strong understanding of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is well-organized with an introductory paragraph, two body paragraphs addressing different points, and a conclusion. This helps to maintain a logical structure.
task achievement
Relevant examples, such as the personal example about commuting to work, effectively support the main points. This enhances the persuasiveness of the argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
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