You have bought a new camera but when you got it home you found it had some problems.You returned the camera and spoke the companyrepresentative a week ago but the camera has still not been repaired.Intoduce myself,Explain the situation,Say what action you would like the company to take.

#camera #home #companyrepresentative #week #intoduce #situation #action #company

Dear Sir or Madam, I am writing to complain about your

company

enterprise workers.

Firstly

, I intoduce myself, my full name is Jo'raqulova Dilnura. I live in Mubarek and your

company

has located behind "Nur" market in the Mubarek. A week ago, I bought a new

camera

in your

company

. I found beautiful

camera

in your

company

That is

why I bought it but

this

camera

did not work when I got home.I found any problemes. Than I was very upset and I called

company

service.They said came to our

company

and tell what is problem with the

camera

.I explained problems to to them. Workers said:"We will go for a week. But the

camera

has still not been repaired. I panicked becouse l wanted to take pictures of my family. Than I waited two weeks. Furthemore they still have not arrived.I was very nervous and I called

company

director. Why your service employers do not work on time. There was no news from them.I asked : they must receive a full refund money. Your sincerely , Jo'raqulova Dilnura

Submitted by omondavlat91 on Sun Aug 11 2024

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coherence cohesion

Work on improving the structure of your letter. Organize your ideas into clear paragraphs: introduction, explanation of the problem, actions taken, and your request. This will make your letter easier to follow.

coherence cohesion

Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar. Some sentences are awkward or confusing. For example, use 'problems' instead of 'problemes' and 'advice' instead of 'advices.'

task achievement

Ensure that your ideas are presented logically. The flow of information was a bit choppy. Try to describe the order of events sequentially to improve clarity.

coherence cohesion

Always conclude your letters with a clear and concise closing statement. This will provide a strong end to your correspondence.

task achievement

You have provided a detailed description of the problem and the actions you have taken. This gives a comprehensive picture to the reader.

task achievement

You were clear about the action you wanted to be taken, in this case, a full refund. This adds to the clarity of your complaint.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

178 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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You have bought a new camera but when you got it home you found it had some problems.You returned the camera and spoke the companyrepresentative a week ago but the camera has still not been repaired.Intoduce myself,Explain the situation,Say what action you would like the company to take.

Fully explain your ideas

some people thinhk that using mobile phones and computers has a negative effect on young people'reading and writing skills . to what extend do you agree or disagree

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

Directors of large organisations receive much higher salaries than ordinary workers. Some think it is necessary, while others think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to the cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing, Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to the cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing,  Do you think this is a positive or negative development?