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Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

The most effective way to solve the current traffic and pollution problems in cities is to encourage people to move from the suburbs or countryside into the city centre. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#traffic #pollution #cities #people #move #suburbs #countryside #city #centre
Many people believe that encouraging the movement of citizens from the countryside to the
city
 centre is the ideal option to solve
the
Correct article usage
apply
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environmental problems,
such
 as traffic congestion and air pollution. Personally, I completely disagree with
this
 statement, and
with
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in
show examples
this
 essay, I will
discussed
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discuss
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 the supported statements.
To begin
 with, the increasing number of populations in a
city
 will impact on the higher number of
vechicles'
Correct your spelling
vehicles
 consumption for human daily transportation. In modern
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
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, the distance from the housing region to the workplace and public places
often
Add a missing verb
is often
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 far away so transportation is the key to help their mobilization. The comfortable feeling
to have
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of having
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 their own cars or bikes will support every
individuals
Change to a genitive case
individual's
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 movement from one place to another place.
For example
, with private transport, everyone could feel free and can predict their time to go somewhere.
However
,
i
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I
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 would not overlook the other sides too. There are several solutions that must be complemented. The enhancement of public transportation can attract
humanbeing
Correct your spelling
human being
human beings
 to do their
activies
Correct your spelling
activities
 with public transport,
instead
 of having
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it by
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by
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on
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 their own.
Government
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The government
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 could make it as convenient as possible and make the schedule more frequent with the regulation or policy.
Thus
,
to conclude
 the discussion,
while
 mobility changing
of
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apply
show examples
the citizens of a
city
 to another
city
 would be the main solution to reduce the current traffic and pollution problems, I believe there is another complemented policy that can support it like the amenities for the public.
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task achievement
Ensure that your thesis and main points are clearly stated and directly address the essay prompt.
task achievement
Focus on maintaining clarity and avoiding repetitive phrases or ideas to ensure your argument is complete and comprehensive.
task achievement
Strengthen your argument by providing more specific examples and evidence.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph transitions smoothly and logically from one idea to the next.
coherence cohesion
Clearly distinguish between your main points and support each one with clear evidence or explanations.
general
Proofread your essay to avoid grammatical errors and ensure a professional tone throughout.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
You raised valid concerns about the increase in vehicle usage and provided a plausible alternative solution.
task achievement
Attempts to provide examples and show understanding of the issue are evident.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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