Some people believe that technology has made man more social. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Write at least 250 words

this

modern

world

, the use of technology is on the rise. There is a general claim that modern technology helps reduce the distance between public members. It is agreed that the advantage of science in computers and

smartphones

has brought many good impacts for humans in general. Analyzing the telecommunication infrastructure

as well as

the growth in the number of modern applications on

smartphones

nowadays will prove

this

Firstly

, with the growth of the

Internet

, the telecommunication industry has been upgraded with both its speed and methods of

connection

For instance

, a telephone call has been upgraded from wire to wireless within the

last

century with the introduction of mobile phones.

In addition

to that,

smartphones

nowadays, which are equipped with

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

high-quality camera systems and fast

Internet

connections, can upgrade an audio call to a Facetime, and

this

connection

is not limited to a specific region but anywhere in the

world

As a result

, communication has never been

this

simple ever since the advantages mobile phones and the

Internet

brought to our lives.

Secondly

, the rise of

smartphones

and electronic devices

also

brought many applications to assist our daily

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

from many perspectives.

For example

, many social

media

platforms like Facebook,

Youtube

Correct your spelling

YouTube

show examples

or Twitter help deliver news, photos and videos to anyone on earth within an instant moment.

Furthermore

, newspapers and studios are taking

this

advantage to assist their daily work, which

also

helps share hot news and

media

products to customers just by a smartphone with an

Internet

connection

This

trend has proved to be faster and more efficient than traditional

media

platforms like paper and TV shows. In conclusion, there is no denying that the boom of technology has brought many advantages to the human era. From the telephone that helps create a one-on-one bridge

connection

, to social

media

that helps us connect to other areas around the

world

, it creates a society where everyone can share and talk to each other. It is predicted that the future of the

world

will still depend on these technological advantages and humans will play a key role in

this

process.

Submitted by xbinh91 on Mon Aug 12 2024

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task achievement

You have provided a well-structured response with clear and coherent ideas. However, consider elaborating on the counter-arguments briefly to showcase a balanced view. This will demonstrate your ability to reflect on different perspectives.

coherence cohesion

Your essay is logically structured, with clear paragraphs, and each paragraph flows well into the next. Nevertheless, paying extra attention to transitional phrases could further enhance the flow.

task achievement

The introduction effectively sets up the topic and clearly states the main argument.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion neatly summarizes the main points and reinforces the argument presented.

task achievement

Each paragraph has a clear main idea and is well-supported by relevant examples, which strengthens your argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

352 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

social interaction
connect
communicate
video conferencing
stay in touch
online communities
forums
like-minded individuals
global communication
collaboration
access to information
knowledge
bridge the gap
social isolation
detachment
face-to-face communication
genuine human connection
maintain
real-life interactions
balance

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Some people believe that technology has made man more social. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Write at least 250 words

Your opinion

In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an approriate use of government money?

Most modern families have both parents working and as a result children spend less time with their parents. What is the reason? What problems can this cause?

Some people says that it is a waste of public money to spend on cultural events, others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion

A few people debate that technological inventions like cellphone are making people socially less interactive. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Rich countries often gives financial aid to developing countries although this not a solution to poverty therefore developed countries should give other types of financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?