Some people think that it is a waste of money for countries to host big sporting events like the world cup, and that the money would be better spent on other things. However, others think that hosting large sporting events has a clear, positive impact on a coutry. Discuss both views

There is ongoing debate in the
sports
field that money spent on large-scale
events
such
as the Olympics or World Cups is wasted and pollution-causing but others think that not only about the reputation of that event associated with individual nations but
also
about bringing international cooperation to local
sports
companies.
This
writer believes that encouraging these prominent
events
can enhance the political and economic relationships between nations and help local citizens gain financial profit. It is obvious that setting up large competitions or
events
demands a huge amount of money from local residents. In
this
case, other activities to enhance facilities or citizen services will be procrastinated leading to backward and requiring a long period to develop. It can not be denied that there is an increase in pollution from every large event especially
sports
where millions of people throw personal trash away after the event has ended .
As a result
, more and more polluted places appear because of the irresponsible actions of spectators.
Conversely
, athlete success in big host
events
can gain a reputation for an individual nation which is the most important element of a developing country. In detail,
this
definitely appeals to foreign visitors and
this
helps local residents in finding jobs and making money.
Along with
this
benefit is improved life quality for citizens in local areas
such
as places located near the sea where associated with a lot of well-known swimmers and sooner or later, individual nations will steadily develop. In my opinion, high-impact
events
of
sports
can benefit from international cooperation which builds a strong political and economic relationship in the future. In
this
case, athletes will have more resources to practice and hone their skills in an effective way.
For example
, Nguyen Thi Anh Vien a famous swimmer who has received many rewards from the international
events
that helped Vietnam catch up with other countries
in particular
sports
. In conclusion,
this
writer is swayed by the long-term benefits of international relationships and making a profit by reputation rather than some drawbacks of high investment costs and pollution.
Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
The essay provides a balanced discussion of both views, which is good. However, ensure you avoid minor inaccuracies to present a polished response. For example, 'pollution-causing' could be rewritten for clarity.
coherence cohesion
While the essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, the logical structure between paragraphs can be improved for smoother transitions. Consider using transition words and phrases to guide the reader.
task achievement
Some points could benefit from further development and specific examples to strengthen your argument. For instance, elaborate more on how local citizens gain financial profit and provide concrete examples.
task achievement
The essay introduces relevant examples, but more detailed and specific examples would make your arguments stronger. For example, explaining exactly how Nguyen Thi Anh Vien's success benefited Vietnam would be effective.
coherence cohesion
Although your main points are clear, ensure each paragraph maintains a singular focus. Be mindful of not mixing ideas within paragraphs to enhance coherence.
coherence cohesion
The essay's structured approach with a clear introduction and conclusion enhances readability.
task achievement
You have effectively discussed both sides of the argument, demonstrating a balanced perspective.
task achievement
The use of real-world examples, such as Nguyen Thi Anh Vien, adds credibility to your arguments.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: