Some people think that it is best to accept bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss bot these views and give your own opinion

Wt2. Some
people
believe that it is best to accept a bad situation,
such
as an unsatisfactory job or
shortage
Correct article usage
a shortage
show examples
of
money
. Others argue that it is better to try and improve
such
situations.
Although
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
some individuals think that it is best to adopt a bad situation,
such
as job dissatisfaction or deficiency in
money
, I utterly agree that it is better to take
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
action to deal with challenges. On the one hand,
people
believe that acceptance of the problem can help to overcome the difficulties
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
since it gives you great freedom and mental stability. Truly accepting
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
reality can be
powerful
Add an article
a powerful
show examples
tool. Because by solace you try to understand the situation,
Correct word choice
and it’s
show examples
it’s
Replace the word
its
show examples
difficulties without anxiety, stress or pressure. It means less emotional suffering and
burn out
Correct your spelling
burnout
show examples
in the long run.
That is
way
Correct your spelling
why
show examples
they prefer to go with the flow.
For example
, a mom heard a bad diagnosis of her child. If a mother does not want to confess
kid’s
Correct pronoun usage
her kid’s
show examples
illness, she can not even
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
help
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
her son.
Whereas
the confession opens your eyes towards the point and
motivate
Change the verb form
motivates
show examples
her to understand
causes
Correct article usage
the causes
show examples
and solutions for
this
crisis.
Hence
,
this
explains why some
people
chooses
Change the verb form
choose
show examples
to accept the bad news or situations.
On the other hand
, it is better to try and solve the problem, because by doing something, you will find
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
ways to fix the obstacles often becoming stronger. You never know something without implementing the solution.
For example
, you have a business idea and want to create a new product or service,
moreover
Add a comma
moreover,
show examples
you always think about it and stress
to
Correct word choice
whether to
show examples
start or not. If the person makes a decision and
Change the verb form
actualises
show examples
actualise
Correct pronoun usage
actualise it
show examples
, he or she will
figured
Change the verb form
figure
show examples
out a solution and will make
money
. Even
the
Correct word choice
if the
show examples
project was bad enough, the human will get an experience and grow as a businessman. Taking
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
action
aid
Correct subject-verb agreement
aids
show examples
them to gain
money
or challenge
Correct pronoun usage
them anyways
show examples
anyways
Correct your spelling
anyway
show examples
. I totally understand and agree with the
last
point since solving problems is the key feature of development and growth. In conclusion, some
people
believe that acceptance gives you a chance to overcome
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
challenges,
nevertheless
Add a comma
nevertheless,
show examples
I agree with human beings
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
think the reaction to the problems can help you to achieve your goals and solve the difficulties in your life.
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Your essay addresses the topic well, providing a balanced discussion of both viewpoints. However, make sure to elaborate more on each argument with additional examples or points.
coherence cohesion
Make use of more transitional phrases to create a smoother flow between sentences and paragraphs. This will enhance cohesion and make your essay more coherent.
grammar
You often mix tenses and miss small grammatical details. Paying attention to these will make your ideas clearer and improve overall readability.
task achievement
Consider expanding each point a bit more to add depth to your essay. This will showcase your ability to provide detailed and specific ideas.
coherence cohesion
You provided a clear introduction that sets the stage for your essay and a conclusion that effectively summarizes your main points.
task achievement
Your examples are relevant and help illustrate your points effectively. Keep including specific examples to support your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Resilience
  • Pragmatic
  • Survival tactic
  • Emotional and psychological preparation
  • Feasible
  • Proactive mindset
  • Skill acquisition
  • Networking
  • Personal growth
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Resourcefulness
  • Motivation
  • Well-being
  • Achievement
  • Frustration
  • Ambition
  • Community impact
  • Acceptance
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!