IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Below are two charts showing the top 12 nations in military spending for 2005 and those countries' GDP growth for the same year. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

#two #nations #countries #gdp #growth #year #information #features #comparisons
The bar charts compare the military spending of the top 12 nations in 2005 with their
GDP
growth
 for the same year.
Overall
, it is evident that the United States had the highest military expenditure,
while
 China had the highest
GDP
growth
. Other Asian nations
also
 tended to have higher
GDP
growth
 rates than the Western European countries. The United States dominated military spending in 2005, with an expenditure of $400
billion
, which is five times that of both China and Russia, at $80
billion
 each. The U.K., France and Japan occupied the third highest position ($50
billion
), fourth ($40
billion
) and fifth ($35
billion
) respectively. Germany's military spending was half that of France. India and Saudi Arabia both spent $10
billion
,
while
 South Korea's expenditure was slightly less at around $8
billion
.
By contrast
, the figures for Italy and Australia were the lowest, at only 5
billion
 dollars. As regards
GDP
growth
 in 2005, China took the lead with a rate of 9%, followed by Russia with 7%. The figures for India and Saudi Arabia were roughly the same (around 6%). South Korea's
growth
 rate of 5% was marginally higher than that of the United States (4.8%). The figures for Australia, the United Kingdom and Japan were 4%, 3,5% and just over 3% respectively. Meanwhile, France, Germany, and Italy all had the lowest
GDP
growth
 at around 2%.
Submitted by weezel on

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task achievement
Your essay does a great job of summarizing the key features of the charts and making relevant comparisons. For an even higher score, consider adding a brief conclusion to summarize your findings.
coherence cohesion
You have maintained a logical structure and presented information clearly. However, ensure all sentences within a paragraph flow naturally and are closely related to the main point being discussed.
task achievement
You have effectively identified and reported the main features of the charts.
task achievement
You have used relevant specific examples to support your main points, which strengthens your response.
coherence cohesion
Logical structure and use of paragraphs make your essay easy to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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