Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for qualifications. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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It is debated that some enrollments argue whether to focus on one or multiple subjects for a better future. I believe that
study
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studying
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all topics would
make sure
Verb problem
ensure
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a finer outcome by
broadering
Correct your spelling
broadening
their perspectives about their
coming times
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future
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career
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careers
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and
enhance
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enhancing
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critical thinking
skills
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.
To begin
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with, studying more than one
subjects
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subject
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can help
broadening
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broaden
show examples
their perspectives in regard to
foreseeable
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the foreseeable
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profession. When a student has more knowledge and
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are exposured
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exposured
Correct your spelling
exposure
to various education fields, it is
undoubtable
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undoubtedly
that they will have more insight
about
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in
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their
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the
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long run.
For instance
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, individuals with a limitation academic tend to choose
wrong
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the wrong
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pathways since
their
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they
show examples
only understand a few
point
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points
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of view.
In addition
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, a diverse
subject
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can make sure students
to
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apply
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develop a higher skill
such
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as problem-solving
skills
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. When taking part in multiple areas of education, it can be difficult and challenging but in the long term, pupils will find it easy to manage as they have developed their
skills
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in useful ways.
On the other hand
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, freshmen who
is
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are
show examples
focusing solely on
main
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the main
show examples
subject
Use synonyms
may
lead to
Verb problem
have
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a
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apply
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better
overall
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academic performance. When specializing in
main
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the main
show examples
subject
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, not only
reduce
Correct subject-verb agreement
reduces
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stress but
also
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time management.
Moreover
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,
this
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provides
a
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apply
show examples
depth
knowledge
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of knowledge
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and expertise
on
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in
show examples
chosen
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the chosen
show examples
field.
However
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, I believe that individuals should not limit their expertness rather than explore
towards
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apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
wisdom. In conclusion,
although
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solely on
main
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the main
show examples
subject
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can help improve
overall
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performance and reduce stress, I believe focusing on multiple subjects can help
diverse
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diversify
show examples
a person's perspective in terms of career, and
developing
Wrong verb form
develop
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their critical thinking
skills
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by tifjong on

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task achievement
Try to construct a more clear and engaging introduction to help set the stage for your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single clear idea and that supporting points are well-developed with specific examples.
coherence cohesion
Use transitions like 'furthermore,' 'in contrast,' and 'however' to make your arguments flow more logically.
task achievement
Work on your language accuracy, including subject-verb agreement and word choice, to improve clarity.
task achievement
You have attempted to discuss both views, which shows a balanced approach.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes a conclusion that summarizes your opinion effectively.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • - Holistic development
  • - Broadening perspectives
  • - Critical thinking skills
  • - Versatile and adaptable
  • - Job market
  • - Interdisciplinary thinking
  • - Problem-solving skills
  • - Academic performance
  • - Stress management
  • - Time management
  • - In-depth knowledge
  • - Expertise
  • - Resource allocation
  • - Core subjects
  • - Chosen domains
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