Some people believe school children should be given multiple vacations while others think they should get one long vacation. Discuss advantages for both and give your opinion.

#people #school #children #vacations #vacation

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There is an ongoing debate in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society regarding the way the

schoo

Correct your spelling

school

holidays are given to children. Some opine holidays should be given at different times of

years

Fix the agreement mistake

year

show examples

while

others think one single long holiday should be provided. I agree with the former statement multiple

vaccations

Correct your spelling

vacations

vaccinations

should be given to students as it helps them rejuvenate after every holiday period which later helps with

heir

Correct your spelling

their

show examples

productivity and

effiiency

Correct your spelling

efficiency

Change preposition

in studying

show examples

study

. First of all, everyone needs a little break after a

while

, be it a student, a housewife or a corporate employee. Little

breaks

different

Add an article

a different

show examples

Fix the agreement mistake

times

show examples

time

Fix the agreement mistake

times

show examples

of the year

helps

Change the verb form

help

show examples

an individual to freshen up and get back to their work/

study

much more focused. Regular

breaks

also

helps

Change the verb form

help

show examples

to reduce

burnouts

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burnout

show examples

For instance

Alot

Correct your spelling

a lot

of schools

who

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that

show examples

adopted

Correct article usage

the cambridge

show examples

cambridge

Change the capitalization

Cambridge

show examples

study

pattern

use

Wrong verb form

used

show examples

to give 15 mins

break

Correct subject-verb agreement

breaks

show examples

every

one

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apply

show examples

hour to their kids to help them release stress and fatigue.

Furthermore

regular

Add an article

the regular

show examples

interval between

study

Fix the agreement mistake

studies

show examples

helps students to be more productive and efficient. As mentioned

breaks

help an individual to manage

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

his

her

show examples

stress. it

further

helps them to focus clearly on the required goal. It is clinically proven children who take

breaks

in between their studies score better

then

Replace the word

than

show examples

thoes

Correct your spelling

those

who don't. In conclusion, multiple

vaccaction

Correct your spelling

vaccinations

can help children to release

burnouts

Fix the agreement mistake

burnout

show examples

, fatigue and stress and it

also

helps them to be more productive and efficient after the break.

Submitted by vasudha.gupta0818 on Thu Aug 15 2024

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task achievement

Work on integrating more specific and relevant examples to strengthen your points.

task achievement

Ensure your sentences are clear and concise to avoid any ambiguity.

coherence cohesion

Pay attention to grammar and punctuation to improve readability and clarity.

coherence cohesion

Organize your essay with clear paragraphing to guide the reader through your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Correct any spelling and minor grammatical errors to enhance the overall quality of your writing.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are clear and provide a good framework for the essay.

coherence cohesion

The essay presents a logical argument in favor of multiple vacations for school children.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

230 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

avoid burnout
consistent rhythm
recharge
improved focus
motivation
academic stress
retention
deep learning
internships
part-time jobs
disruption
fragmented learning
balanced approach

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Some people believe school children should be given multiple vacations while others think they should get one long vacation. Discuss advantages for both and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Sending criminals to prison is not the best method of dealing with them. Education and job training are better ways tohelp them. Do you agree or disagree?

The figure shows demographic trends in Scotland. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

You are interested in applying for a job advertised in a local newspaper. Write a letter to the hiring manager expressing your interest and outlining your qualifications and experience.