Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Nowadays, people are too obsessed with buying or acquiring material things such as expensive clothes or cars because, they think that people around them will judge them based on what they possess.

#people #clothes #cars #judge

this

contemporary era, most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

people

are more obsessed with buying expensive materials

such

Correct your spelling

show examples

clothes or cars because they think that

people

around them will judge them based on what they possess. I

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

strongly agree with

this

statement.

Therefore

, in

this

essay

Add a comma

essay,

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I will discuss the reasons why they like to do

this

. The

Frist

Correct your spelling

First

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reason is following famous

people

. They

influence

Wrong verb form

are influenced

show examples

from

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show examples

these

people

because they follow their social media accounts and

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

want to be like them. They think all famous individuals in

socail

Correct your spelling

social

media are glad when they are buying expensive products.

For example

, if they saw the trends of

Submitted by um.maktoum2014 on Fri Aug 16 2024

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task response

Ensure you fully develop your main points with clear and specific examples to enhance your argument.

coherence

Try to use a well-structured introduction and conclusion to frame your essay effectively.

cohesion

Work on improving your grammatical accuracy and lexical resource for clear communication.

task response

You have confidently expressed your opinion on the topic.

task response

Your essay shows engagement with current societal issues, which is relevant to the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

2 paragraphs

106 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

material wealth
social media influence
advertising
high-end products
better lifestyle
peer pressure
societal norms
luxury items
financial strain
personal growth
temporary satisfaction
long-term happiness
fulfillment

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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Nowadays, people are too obsessed with buying or acquiring material things such as expensive clothes or cars because, they think that people around them will judge them based on what they possess.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many companies sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think this is good for the world of sports, while others think there are disadvantages of this. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

In some countries, people's weight has significantlyincreased, while their levels of health have decreased. What do you think may be the causes of this problem,and what solutions can you suggest to solve them?

In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. What are your opinions on this?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their m ain subjects. Others believe that it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that the best way to reduce the time spent in travelling to work is to replace parks and gardens close to the city center with apartment buildings for commuters, but others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.