IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

You have recently ordered an item from the internet, but are not happy with the purchase. Write to the company. In your letter •Describe what you purchased •Explain why you are not happy with the purchase •Tell them what you would like them to do about the situation

#item #internet #purchase #company #•describe #•explain #•tell #situation
Good afternoon, dear sir/madam. My name is Anastassia, and I'm your recent customer. I'm writing
this
 letter with the purpose of explaining the issue I have with my purchase and understanding what kind of solutions can you advise. I purchased a pair of fancy sneakers in your online shop two weeks ago. Before that, I measured my legs very accurately.
Moreover
, it's not my first time buying shoes online. But when I got my parcel, I realised that the size you have written on your site is not right. These shoes are too small, and unfortunately, I haven't somebody else at home who can use it.
Finally
, I hope that you'll give me an opportunity to send them back and get a new pair of the same sneakers in the correct size. Best regards. Anastassia.
Submitted by anastasia on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
You can provide more specific details about what exactly is wrong with the size (e.g., is it too narrow, or too short?). This will give the company a clearer understanding of your issue.
coherence and cohesion
Consider dividing the explanation of your shopping experience and the description of the problem into separate paragraphs for better clarity.
coherence and cohesion
The greeting and closing are polite and appropriate.
task achievement
The tone of your letter is very suitable and courteous.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: