The charts below show the proportion of people’s total spending in a particular European country was spent on different commodities and services in 1958 and in 2008.

The charts below show the proportion of people’s total spending in a particular European country was spent on different commodities and services in 1958 and in 2008.
The presented pie charts compare the number of
crowd's
Change noun form
crowd
show examples
expenditure
Fix the agreement mistake
expenditures
show examples
in a particular European country
devided
Correct your spelling
divided
decided
by six different goods and services between 1958 and 2008. From an
overall
perspective, it can be seen that there were
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
different trends during both intervening years.
While
the most selling products in 1958
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
for food, in 2008 it has changed to
housing
Add an article
the housing
show examples
area. Examining the first diagram, the most spending sector accounted for food at more than 30 per
cent
, making it the biggest segment among others.
Additionally
, housing
recorded
Add a missing verb
was recorded
show examples
as the second largest data, being 22% of the total. Following closely, exactly 18
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
of
money
Add an article
the money
show examples
used
Add a missing verb
was used
show examples
for clothing and there was 5 per
cent
lower for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
entertainment (13%).
Moreover
, in 1958, less than 10 per
cent
of sales
represent
Verb problem
were
show examples
for travel and luxury goods. Moving on to the sales in 2008, over 30% spent
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
housing in the next
half century
Add a hyphen
half-century
show examples
. Both transportation and expensive things have the same level at 17% and continued by
clothing
Correct article usage
the clothing
show examples
sector
about
Change preposition
at about
show examples
16%.
Although
in the previous
years
Add a comma
years,
show examples
food became the most popular sector, it has dropped to only 12%
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
the total.
Lastly
, entertainment witnessed the least number,
accouting
Correct your spelling
accounting
for only 6 per
cent
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
the total.
Submitted by as on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words cent with synonyms.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • proportion
  • expenditure
  • commodities
  • services
  • necessities
  • luxury goods
  • trends
  • significant changes
  • expenditure
  • housing and utilities
  • summarize
  • highlight
  • primary trends
  • fifty-year period
  • economic growth
  • technological advancements
  • societal values
  • analyze
  • observe
What to do next:
Look at other essays: