The diagrams below show the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

#diagrams #show #process #sugar #cane #summaries #information #features #comparisons

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The flow diagram illustrates the process of

sugar

Use synonyms

production from

sugar

Use synonyms

cane. We can see that

sugar

Use synonyms

is made using a raw material that grows for over a year, and the manufacturing process

consist

Correct subject-verb agreement

consists

show examples

of seven distinct stages.

Furthermore

Linking Words

harvesting stage can be taken in two different ways, by machine and by hand.

At the first stage

Linking Words

in the production of

sugar

Use synonyms

sugar

Use synonyms

canes are sowed into the soil and left growing for a period of 12-18 months.

Next,

Linking Words

the plant is harvested manually, or with the assistance of technologies.

Then

Linking Words

, the

sugar

Use synonyms

cane

is passing

Wrong verb form

passes

show examples

through

crashing

Add an article

the crashing

show examples

machine, producing

Change the article

show examples

juice

at the end

Linking Words

. After that, juices

Change the verb form

are

show examples

purifying

Wrong verb form

purified

show examples

by going through

limestone

Correct article usage

a limestone

show examples

filter. The following stage begins with the heating

the

Change preposition

of the

show examples

evaporator, in which, the purifyed juice is later poured. The sixth

steps

Fix the agreement mistake

step

show examples

involes

Correct your spelling

involves

centrifuge

Correct article usage

a centrifuge

show examples

, spinning at a high speed

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

separates crystals from

syrup

Add an article

the syrup

show examples

Finally

Linking Words

, the syrup is

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

dryed

Correct your spelling

dried

in a

low temperature

Add a hyphen

low-temperature

show examples

container, and the

sugar

Use synonyms

is produced.

Submitted by talgattan4ez on Sun Aug 18 2024

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

▼

Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

▼

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

163 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

cultivation
harvesting
mechanically
juice extraction
purifying
impurities
evaporation
concentration
crystallization
centrifuges
distribution

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The diagrams below show the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

Children find it difficult to concentrate on or pay attention to their studies in school. What are the reasons? How can we solve this problem?

it is important for people to take risk both in their professional lives and their personal lives . Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweighs the disadvantages?