In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

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Befor
Correct your spelling
Before
college, many young people are advised that,
take
Correct subject-verb agreement
takes
show examples
a
year
for travelling
Change preposition
to travel
show examples
or
working
Wrong verb form
work
show examples
.
This
essay will argue the
cos
Correct your spelling
cons
show examples
and pros
for
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of
show examples
taking a
year
after high school.
This
essay will estimate that
acquire
Wrong verb form
acquiring
show examples
experience about the world and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
may
be inhibition
Wrong verb form
inhibit
show examples
the incentive for studying. The main
advantages
Fix the agreement mistake
advantage
show examples
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
taking one
year
gap
befor
Correct your spelling
before
college is earning both experience and money. When students try to travel
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
other places and practice several jobs
that
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
returned
Wrong verb form
return
show examples
with high experts and general information. That which
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
them to identify the role and the
profission
Correct your spelling
profession
will complete in it.
Furthermore
,
thatmake
Correct your spelling
that make
youg
Correct your spelling
young
people know more about themselves.
Additionallity
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Additionally
, working
befor
Correct your spelling
before
for
the university
is ensured
Wrong verb form
ensures
show examples
income for them, and they can save money to
comlete
Correct your spelling
complete
their studies.
The studying
Correct article usage
Studying
show examples
Change preposition
at in
show examples
in
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
Iraqi university
nees
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costs
about 5000$ per
year
.
In contrast
, taking a
year
befor
Correct your spelling
before
joining the universities
due to
delay in
them
Change the pronoun
their
show examples
career and diminished the motivation for studying. When they start working with monthly revenuer will make them felt achieving their
goul
Correct your spelling
goal
goals
and what they need more if
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
earn
Change the verb form
earned
show examples
money
last
months
Fix the agreement mistake
month
show examples
.
Nontheless
Correct your spelling
Nonetheless
, after termination their studies will be older than
them
Correct pronoun usage
theirs
show examples
which
compelete
Correct your spelling
complete
direct
Replace the word
directly
show examples
. Most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
industries
Add an article
the industries
show examples
give the
jubs
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jobs
oppertunities
Correct your spelling
opportunities
for
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to
show examples
fresh
graduated
Replace the word
graduates
show examples
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
small
age
Fix the agreement mistake
ages
show examples
. In
conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
show examples
even though working after high school
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
show examples
adulthood
opprtunites
Correct your spelling
opportunities
opportunity
to earn
experiements
Correct your spelling
experiences
,
that
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
undergo
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
challange
Correct your spelling
challenges
to get
labour
Change preposition
into labour
show examples
after graduation. The students need
acquision
Correct your spelling
acquisition
rest after high school, but they should save
them
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
trigger to study hard and
achievement
Replace the word
achieve
show examples
them
Change the pronoun
their
show examples
dreams.
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task achievement
Ensure that your introduction clearly introduces the topic and outlines your main arguments. This helps readers understand what to expect in the essay.
coherence cohesion
Try to eliminate grammatical errors and improve sentence structure for better readability. Reading more academic articles or essays can help in understanding how complex sentences are formed.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and elaborate on your points to strengthen your argument. This will add depth to your essay and demonstrate your understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion should effectively summarize your main arguments and restate your position. This reinforces your perspective and leaves a lasting impression on the reader.
task achievement
Your essay covers both advantages and disadvantages, providing a balanced view on the topic. This is essential for a well-rounded discussion.
coherence cohesion
You attempted to use varied sentence structures, which is commendable. This shows your effort to enhance the essay's readability.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural immersion
  • Life experience
  • Work ethic
  • Career readiness
  • Self-discovery
  • Delayed gratification
  • Intellectual stagnation
  • Financial implications
  • Social dynamics
  • Academic trajectory
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