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Band 2.5

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting ones is very important for people? Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a postivie or negative situation?

#countries #home #ones #people #be #case #postivie #situation
Not Thinking about Tomorrow
does
Capitalize word
Does
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 it Saved Your Today? First
with
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of
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 all; the core of bacically initial human nature is
desire
Add an article
the desire
a desire
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of
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to
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 keep yourself in safety and occur
at
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in
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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a way that
continue
Change the verb form
continues
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 to exist in
the
Correct article usage
a
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stability
Replace the word
stable
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 situation. At the same
time
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time,
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 it had not been to be easy when we looked
that
Change preposition
at that
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 situation from past to present. There are
wide
Correct article usage
a wide
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 variety
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of compenents
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compenents
Correct your spelling
components
component
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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being
homeowner
Correct article usage
a homeowner
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. It
has been depending
Wrong verb form
depends
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 on your financial state, your current
budgetary
Replace the word
budget
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, the country or location where
do
Verb problem
apply
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you want to live and what kind of home
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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you want
?
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.
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 It is usually that
this
 is a positive development but
this
also
 produced a large number of negative
consequenses
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consequences
such
 as like everything.
For example
; maybe,
to
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apply
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thinking about
future
Correct article usage
the future
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 may prevent
Correct pronoun usage
us to
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to live
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from living
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 better today
..
Replace the punctuation
.
...
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On the other
hand
Add a comma
hand,
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 some argue
believed
Verb problem
apply
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that how free you are related
with
Change preposition
to
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 how
less have
Verb problem
little
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 you have.
Neverthaless
Correct your spelling
Nevertheless
; in my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
 it will have been
undeniable
Correct article usage
an undeniable
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 truth that being
homeowner
Add an article
a homeowner
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 can contribute to less
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
thinking about your future and may let permission to
walking
Wrong verb form
walk
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 throughout in your
lifecircle
Correct your spelling
life circle
lifecycle
 with by comfortable
stepts
Correct your spelling
steps
. Many people believe that
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
being
homeowner
Add an article
a homeowner
show examples
 is
make
Fix the infinitive
to make
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 certain
your
Change preposition
of your
show examples
 future life.
For
this
 reason in conclusion; you should aim to ensure your life guarantee and for
ensure
Change the verb form
ensuring
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 your quality of life
to
Change preposition
by
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reorganization
Replace the word
reorganising
show examples
 spending habits.
Submitted by yagmurryurttas on

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task achievement
The essay attempts to address the question but lacks clarity and thoroughness in its response. Ensure that your main ideas directly address the essay prompt and are well-supported with clear arguments and examples.
coherence cohesion
Some ideas are difficult to follow due to awkward phrases and grammatical errors. Ensure a logical flow by breaking down complex sentences into simpler ones and checking for grammatical correctness. Proofreading can help identify these issues.
task achievement
The writer attempts to introduce a variety of ideas related to the topic of homeownership, showcasing an understanding of different perspectives.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a conclusion which summarizes the main points, showing a clear structure in writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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