IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Below is a map of the city of Brandfield. City planners have decided to build a new shopping mall for the area, and two sites, S1 and S2 have been proposed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. 4

Below is a map of the city of Brandfield. City planners have decided to build a new shopping mall for the area, and two sites, S1 and S2 have been proposed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. 4
#city #brandfield #planners #mall #area #two #sites #summarise #information #features #comparisons
This
 chart illustrates a map of the
city
Brandfield
Change preposition
of Brandfield
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 and their plans
about
Change preposition
for
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 building new buildings like: a shopping mall for the area, and two sides,S1 and S2 have been proposed. The main difference between the two sides is that S1 is in the
center
Change the spelling
centre
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 of the Brandfield, but S2 is in an industrial estate.
Also
,in
this
city
Add a comma
city,
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 there is a river,road and railway. Looking at the information in more detail, S1 is in the North part of
this
city
 with housing estates, which
surrounds
Correct subject-verb agreement
surround
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 the town
center
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centre
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.
Nevertheless
, S2 is in the industrial zone of
this
 town,
although
 located in the
South-East
Correct your spelling
southeast
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. To be sure there are golf courses and parks.
Although
Correct word choice
However
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, in my opinion S1 part of
this
 zone will be a satisfying place for the shopping mall and for another
entertaining
Replace the word
entertainment
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 area. To be accurate, S1- is in the middle of
this
city
, but S2 is in the countryside of
this
 country.
Furthermore
, a river and railway run through the central district of the town.
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "although".
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words city with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • proximity
  • residential area
  • industrial zone
  • city center
  • main road
  • benefits
  • convenience
  • traffic congestion
  • accessibility
  • workers
  • compare
  • differences
  • pros and cons
  • suitable
  • analysis
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