With the increasing demand for energy sources of oil and gas, people should look for sources of oil and gas in remote and untouched natural places. Do the advantages outweigh disadvantages of damaging such areas?

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The growing demand for
oil
and
gas
will lead to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
exploitation in distant and untouched places. There are more disadvantages related to
this
problem than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
advantages since it would pose serious damage to the environment regardless of the potential benefit that humans gain
such
Change preposition
from such
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natural fuel at a lower
cost
. On the one hand, drilling remote areas for
oil
and
gas
comes with
the
Correct article usage
an
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incredible
cost
of
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to
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the environment, which has extensive harm
on
Change preposition
to
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wild plants and animals.
In other words
, extracting
such
natural resources will lead to the loss of nature as
people
cut down more trees, promoting environmental pollution.
For instance
, the global temperature is expected to rise with the disappearance of trees whose photosynthesis converts polluted CO2 into clean oxygen, which drops the temperature.
Therefore
, the environmental destruction in extensive areas makes the Earth more hostile to live, causing more
death
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deaths
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of humans
as well as
wild species as they are not able to adapt to
such
a sudden change.
On the other hand
, the extraction of
oil
and
gas
in untouched places is beneficial to humans as they are more easily available at a lower
cost
. Indeed, more supply of natural fuel will reduce its price, which encourages
people
to take advantage of them to promote their lifestyle as they are able to heat their houses in winter and use
gas
for cooking meals and boiling water
to
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for
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their needs.
Furthermore
, the growing use of patrol and
gas
also
encourages economic activities as more
people
travel by vehicles and transport goods from one place to another.
Thus
, drilling
oil
in distant places is significant in increasing
comfort
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the comfort
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of
people
and stimulating
economy
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the economy
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. In conclusion, extracting natural resources should be prevented
due to
the
diadvantage
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disadvantages
that
outweighs
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outweigh
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the
advantage
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advantages
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, considering the huge
cost
imposed on nature, which results in rising
temperature
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temperatures
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and
disappearance
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the disappearance
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of animals.
Although
people
are able to have a higher quality of life
due to
the
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apply
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easy access to them, preserving the environment should be prioritized.
Submitted by mizuho on

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task achievement
Work on providing more varied and specific examples to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure the transition between paragraphs is smoother by using linking words and phrases.
task achievement
Refine the clarity of some sentences to avoid confusion and ensure all ideas are easily understood.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and well-organized structure, including a strong introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
You have successfully addressed the task by discussing both advantages and disadvantages.
coherence cohesion
Main points are well-supported and relevant to the overall argument.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • energy sources
  • industrial growth and development
  • economic benefits
  • job creation
  • revenues
  • technological advancements
  • extraction process
  • biodiversity
  • natural habitats
  • indigenous communities
  • displacement
  • traditional way of life
  • environmental disasters
  • oil spills
  • long-lasting effects
  • widespread effects
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