IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying fulltime or part-time. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. T1 Bar Charts - EducationT

The chart below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying fulltime or part-time. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. T1 Bar Charts - EducationT
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The previous bar charts illustrate the number of
women
Use synonyms
 and
men
Use synonyms
 who attended part-time or full-time higher
education
Use synonyms
 in England during three different years.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be clearly seen that at the beginning of the period (1970), there were more male students attending full-time
education
Use synonyms
 than females. The same figure is shown for part-time
education
Use synonyms
,
however
Linking Words
, the number of both genders is much lower.
In addition
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period (1990), female students attending full-time
education
Use synonyms
 showed a higher number than
men
Use synonyms
, both genders showed a similar figure for part-time
education
Use synonyms
. On
one
Correct article usage
the one
show examples
 hand, in 1970, full-time male students showcased a higher figure than females at around 1000.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
 the rates were quite low, opposite data was recorded for part-time
education
Use synonyms
 with a higher rate of
men
Use synonyms
 (at around 100) than
women
Use synonyms
 (at around 30). A slightly different pattern occurred in 1980, with more full-time and fewer part-time male learners than
women
Use synonyms
 in the same year.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period in 1990,
women
Use synonyms
 exhibited their highest attendance rate for full-time at around 1100,
while
Linking Words
men
Use synonyms
 depicted a lower one at around 900.
In contrast
Linking Words
, for part-time
education
Use synonyms
women
Use synonyms
 and
men
Use synonyms
 demonstrated a similar rate of around 200.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "although, at the end".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words women, men, education with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 6 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: