IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the value of one country’s exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words. Export Earnings (2015 -2016)

The chart below shows the value of one country’s exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words. Export Earnings (2015 -2016)
#value #country’s #exports #categories #percentage #change #category #information #features #comparisons #export #earnings
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The bar chart illustrates the situation of different exported resources between 2015 and 2016.
First,
Linking Words
petroleum
Use synonyms
 was the most exported product in 2015 and 2016 which was about $60
billion
Use synonyms
 worth of
petroleum
Use synonyms
 product exported in 2015.
This
Linking Words
 number experienced an increase of approximately 3% in 2016,
made
Wrong verb form
making
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 them
to
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apply
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nearly $62 million worth
Use synonyms
petroleum
Change preposition
of petroleum
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 products exported.
Moreover
Linking Words
, engineered goods had risen as well, they exported about $58
billion
Use synonyms
 worth of it in 2015;
nevertheless
Linking Words
, they rose to slightly above $60
billion
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 in 2016.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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gems and
jewelries
Change the wording
jewelry
pieces of jewelry
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 experienced a small downfall
for
Change preposition
in
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 export activity in 2016
if
Correct word choice
apply
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compared to 2015,
this
Linking Words
decreases
Wrong verb form
decreased
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 worth about 5,18%. In 2015, they exported about $42
billion
Use synonyms
 worth of gems and
jewelry
Change the spelling
jewellery
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;
nonetheless
Linking Words
, only $40 million were exported in 2016. In conclusion,
petroleum
Use synonyms
 and engineered exported products experienced an increase in 2016
if
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
compared to 2015.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, the gems and
jewelry
Change the spelling
jewellery
show examples
 export decreased in 2016 from 2015.
Submitted by riani.the2 on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words petroleum, billion with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreases" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 4 times.
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