IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

he graph below shows the changing patterns of access to modern technology in homes in the UK

he graph below shows the changing patterns of access to modern technology in homes in the UK
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The graph represents information about how changed patterns of domestic access to modern technology in homes in the UK over the
last
Linking Words
 ten years.
In the
Change preposition
The
show examples
 graph describes
four
Correct article usage
the four
show examples
 main technologies :
CD
Correct article usage
the CD
show examples
 player, mobile phone, home computer and internet access, which
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
 gradually increased in
this
Linking Words
years
Fix the agreement mistake
year
show examples
the most popular
cd
Correct your spelling
CD
show examples
 payer
is
Verb problem
has
show examples
 gradually
rise
Wrong verb form
rose
show examples
 beginning of the
period
Use synonyms
 and
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
 80
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
. the least popular internet access
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
also
Linking Words
 significantly
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
period
Use synonyms
 from 1998 to 2002. The mobile phone
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
fluctuated wildly, accurate
beginning
Correct article usage
the beginning
show examples
 of
this
Linking Words
period
Use synonyms
less
Change preposition
at less
show examples
 than 20%, middle of
this
Linking Words
period
Use synonyms
more
Change preposition
at more
show examples
 than 40% , end of
this
Linking Words
period
Use synonyms
more
Change preposition
at more
show examples
 than 60%.
in
Capitalize word
In
show examples
this
Linking Words
period
Use synonyms
 home
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
also
Linking Words
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 from 25 to 48%.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
▼
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words period with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: