The charts below show the percentages of male and female students of different age groups who studied in Australia for full-time and part-time training in 2006.

#show #percentages #students #age #groups #australia

The two bar charts illustrate the ratio of male and female students of different age groups who studied for full-time and part-time training in Australia during 2006.

Overall

it is clear that

the two genders from 20

years

to 24

years

had

Change the article

the

show examples

highest point in

Remove the article

apply

show examples

part-time training.

According to

what was shown, from 15 to 19

years

, the

female

Correct quantifier usage

number of female

show examples

students was slightly increasing than male students in both

training

Change to a plural noun

trainings

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

part-time by 5% and

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

full-time by 1%. What is more, the percentage of females in both training between 25 to 29

years

had the same level

Change preposition

show examples

about 8%,

while

the ratio of males

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

full-time was

Change the article

apply

show examples

less than

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

part-time

Change preposition

show examples

about 2%.

Submitted by um.maktoum2014 on Thu Aug 22 2024

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 79%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words years with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

120 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

gender distribution
age groups
full-time training
part-time training
participation rates
educational goals
career goals
socio-economic factors
trend analysis
comparison
male students
female students
percentage
Australia
2006

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The charts below show the percentages of male and female students of different age groups who studied in Australia for full-time and part-time training in 2006.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

You visited a hotel last week and left some items behind. Write a letter to the manager stating 1. Details of your stay 2. How important the items are to you 3. How you would want the items to the sent to you

Some people say it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Shops should not be allowed to sell food and drinks tha are scientifically proven to be bad for people's health. To what extend do you agree or disagree?