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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The pie charts below show the sources of the electricity produced in four countries between 2003 and 2008.

The pie charts below show the sources of the electricity produced in four countries between 2003 and 2008.
#show #sources #electricity #four #countries
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The pie chart compares the manufacturing of electricity
production
Use synonyms
 by type, fossil
fuels
Use synonyms
, renewable energy, and nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 in four different countries between 2004 and 2008.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 a huge percentage of fossil
fuels
Use synonyms
 were produced in India and Vietnam,
while
Linking Words
 hydrogen was the main source of electricity in Morocco and
Sweden
Use synonyms
.
According to
Linking Words
 the Indian percentage of fossil
fuels
Use synonyms
 accounted for 81.9% in India,
while
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 figure was just 56% in Vietnam. The lower
production
Use synonyms
 was in nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 at 3.5% and 14.6% for hydropower;
however
Linking Words
, there was no
production
Use synonyms
 of nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 in Vietnam, and 43.7% of
production
Use synonyms
 consisted of hydropower. Turning to
Sweden
Use synonyms
, the main source of electricity was hydropower at 52%,
while
Linking Words
 it was twice as much in Morocco at 95.5%.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the percentage of fossil
fuels
Use synonyms
 was approximately similar, at 4% in
Sweden
Use synonyms
 and 4.5% in Morocco, respectively.
According to
Linking Words
 the data in
Sweden
Use synonyms
 nuclear
power
Use synonyms
 accounted for 44%
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "according to, while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words production, fuels, power, sweden with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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